Ep.20 Jocelyn Pepe

Andrea: [00:00:00] as a little bit of a backstory, in this space of Half Betty, we're hoping women want to come and join us, and then have, an engaging conversation that they feel drawn to sharing it in the Half Betty space.

Andrea: And for me and Krista, to see people making introductions to really close friends

is such a sign of trust.

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: it's putting so much into us caring for their friend who they would never put into a place where they're not well cared for.

So when we hear of people being introduced like yourself through somebody that is also a friend of mine tells us that, we are creating what we want to create, which is [00:01:00] that kind of place where people are gonna put their very favorite people.

Jocelyn: Hmm.

Andrea: So shout out to Christine Turner, and for her trust to put one of her dear friends, into our hands. And that is yourself, Jocelyn.

Jocelyn: Hmm.

Andrea: Christine Turner and I worked together for many years back in our Lululemon days,

Um, she reached out and said, I've got one of my dearest friends, Jocelyn, who I would love to introduce you to. I think that she has the most amazing story that she's been living and navigating. And of course that led to her making introduction and so kindly and so graciously you accepted that invitation and here we are.

so I'm going to ask you to introduce yourself and then if you'd roll [00:02:00] into, a couple of the words that you think describe who Jocelyn is today.

Jocelyn: Thank you. for such a warm, giant hug as an introduction, so kind. I'm really, really grateful to be with you both today and yeah, it's those little connections that really are what life is all about. It's been the thing I've been simmering on all weekend this. connection and women connecting women.

So, I am Jocelyn Pepe. First and foremost, I am a mother of three, a 20-year-old, an 18-year-old, and a 14-year-old. And they are my reason for being, they're my reason for being better. in addition to that, I am on a mission, on a journey to improve the way we care for mental health. And I do that daily.

And my book Claim Your Brain was really the most recent iteration of how that, adventure that I'm on is coming into the world. So I am an author, I [00:03:00] am a mental health researcher and coach, and I work with organizations and individuals to nourish themselves in order to claim their brain health, mental health.

In a whole person way, not a segmented way. and that's really my mission, to shift our narrative that mental health is a them problem and into, it's an us, thing to take care of, to tackle. And I know Andrea, we talked about this, as we were starting, but I am a visionary, so I think that's my first word.

I am a visionary. I am also very humanitarian. So that statement of shifting the narrative on mental health from a them problem to a us, something we need to nurture and take care of, whether we're us as a family, us as a community, us as a workplace. That is my visionary, humanitarian effort in the world.

And it's no small feat to put that type of thought leadership in the world because I set high [00:04:00] standards, but it's what makes me thrive to be this on purpose. So visionary, humanitarian, um, I'm very deep, so I run deep. I do very well in one-to-ones in big, um, experiences. That's often the feedback I get as a keynote speaker is the depth and authenticity and vulnerability that I bring to the conversation.

Um, because not only am I here to lead this very big idea, I am here to lead by example. So those are my top three words. Um, I have more, but, uh, I'll pause there.

Andrea: And you can certainly hear in people's words when they're sharing, their connection to those words. There'ssomething that cannot be made up that isn't fictitious when you hear people claiming their words and you [00:05:00] said something that really,gave me that sense of awe in you are on purpose.

You are living in a way where everything that you're doing, you can feel is highly considered and thoughtful and driven by your vision to be on this path and then be the very best version of what you can possibly be while on it. I so appreciate all of the words. And I wrote, down more than three because I was just like, oh my gosh.

And there's on purpose and there's deep and there's on authentic and there's humanitarian and there's visionary. It's so beautiful how they all rolled so easily because they are what you're living, it's hard to make up words on the fly if we're not actually living them. So thank you for that.

Do you wanna take us intothe story behind [00:06:00] perhaps where there might have been a moment where. your life to that time was a certain way, and something that kind of shifted it

Jocelyn: Oh yes. There's multiple moments that really brought this to life and I'll start with, the reason for why I am on this path is because I knew I was off my path. deeply. That was one of my other words, is intuitive. Intuitively, my body was talking to me. I was really struggling with my mental health. I was trying to navigate how to be the most, nurturing, one of my other words, amazing mom to my three kids and still be purposeful and on path and, and fulfilling the career that I knew I wanted.

So there was this lead into multiple life situations that got me to where I am today. And I would say the lowest point in my journey was navigating divorce at 37 with three little babies. And [00:07:00] the absolute struggle that felt like to, recover from, to heal from my head was spinning. I had no idea what was going on.

That was the lowest moment where. I write it in the book. Uh, those moments made me think I wanted to be checked in to a facility so that somebody could take care of me 'cause I, I felt like I literally couldn't go another day and I had these three beings to take care of. And so my mom, my friends came to support, help me through do the things that allowed me to keep walking.

So that was kind of the lead into experience, number one. And then experience number two, through that journey, I started, making the next best decision for myself, what is next? Because I knew intuitively this was the path I'm meant to be on. I knew it since I was 23 years old, but I wasn't able to follow it.

So there was that level of knowing, but not acting. So [00:08:00] I kept going, um, from that 37-year-old self and just did the next best thing, followed my curiosity. I knew I wanted to train in coaching and knew it was gonna help my mental health, and it did, and I continued. So from there, I kept moving forwards and doing the next thing that felt like the right decision for me.

And there's a whole story in there, but I'll pause with that for a moment, because from there, the 37-year-old self to the, what are we at now? I'm 47. So from a 37-year-old self to the 47-year-old self, there's a massive experience of transformation that happened. But four years ago, I had a brain injury because I was a triathlete and I was cycling.

I had to avoid a crash and my brain blacked out before I got to the brake. So I found myself unconscious on the side of the road not knowing what was going on until I was being put on a flat board. And that was the second most pivotal moment. So those two things in the decade in between, I would say were my catalyst.[00:09:00]

Andrea: Wow. clearly there's really big moments surrounded by so many other aspects of change and shifting and intuition. You used that word a number of times. And something that you said that I was really also interested in is that you said, I knew what I wanted to do when I was 23, and I was really intrigued with how specific you were about being 23.

can you go into that a little bit?

Jocelyn: Yeah, so.

I knew what I wanted to do when I was 23 because I had started university and left, and then I went to college for fashion. So I had done another degree in something that I thought was the thing I really wanted to do. But the year that I left university, I took a course in linguistics [00:10:00] and my whole body just said, yes, I love this.

I love what I'm learning. I love what I'm doing. A lot, a lot of things transpired. I left, I went to totally something different fashion, which fashion was a passion. It wasn't meant to be my career and my purpose. However, I made those decisions as a young person and I enjoyed it. And then at 23, I moved to Connecticut with my husband at the time, and I was a nanny because I couldn't work there.

And she was a clinical psychologist. And so in those days where I was nannying and helping out this family. I read her books, I looked at her bookshelf and I was like, I know this is what I wanna do. I couldn't go back to school at that point in time to be a psychologist, a psychiatrist, anything that's close to the path that I'm currently on.

Um, because what I had to do was do a distance degree, which I did. I did a business degree distance, and that was the thing that I was able to do [00:11:00] at that time, which has served me in the long run, but it wasn't the thing I wanted to do. So that's that pinpoint moment where I knew exactly what I wanted to do at that age, and I felt stuck and like I couldn't do it.

Andrea: So interesting.

so it sounds like you were.discovering these other things that were firing up your brain, firing up your physical body to tell you that this is actually what you wanted to do.

Jocelyn: Hmm.

Andrea: it's amazing to hear that clarity. And do you feel like that level of clarity has really been something that you've found of late?

Jocelyn: SoI always knew what I wanted. I was very independent and very strong internally. But when it came to voicing it, choosing it, trusting it. That's where I struggled. And so that, that comes from, the multiple [00:12:00] experiences that had happened in my life where I chose to quiet myself, not trust myself, make other people right, make myself wrong.

That was a huge theme in my life, that I'm still recovering, make myself wrong first and make others first. that was a huge recovery theme for me. And I, knew, physically, I knew mentally, I knew emotionally what I wanted. And yet when I voiced it, I didn't always follow it or I knew the intuition and I would listen to somebody else's guidance over my own.

So there was this level of knowing deeply, which I still know deeply. It's just now I listen to it and I trust it, and I

Krista: I have a question. So how much do you think was the fact that you were in your early twenties versus something else?

Jocelyn: Mm. Oh, [00:13:00] yeah.There was a huge part of it that is, that's young. Like, and for me specifically, like I didn't totally know what I was going to university to study. I was always a really good student, but I think for me, there was lots of actions I was taking from like, not my higher self, more of my wounded self, because I hadn't had the experience of healing or taking care of myself.

So I would say that part Is the 23-year-old self versus the 47-year-old self. I mean, the amount of learning and growing and investment I've made into being this version of myself is significant.

if we talk about that, that moment, that crash in another really physical aspect of your life, which was connected to, moving your body and being really highly trained Yes, I would say.

Andrea: So that, would've [00:14:00] changed your ability to be as physical as you had been.

How did you find that you navigated that shift at that point when you had that accident?

Jocelyn: Yeah, that's a really good question because my whole life has been about energy output to maintain my mental and emotional wellbeing. It was a place of solace.It was cathartic, like it was the place on a bike where I would just get into a rhythm and just, it was like meditation. I was a swimmer growing up, and swimming is also very meditative, so it was my version of a physical outlet that was also meditative.

And so when I had the accident, I came home. I was literally afraid to go for a walk by myself out of fear. So my nervous system had absolutely seized, and it hasn't been until very recently that I had some weird form of vertigo where I couldn't [00:15:00] drive over bridges. So like

Andrea: Oh wow.

Jocelyn: There's a couple bridges here near where I live, and my body, my nervous system would seize up and wanna drive like 20 on a highway that's moving 120 because I was so afraid of falling off of it.

So that fear of falling manifested so deeply in my nervous system that I didn't wanna walk. When I first came home from the hospital by myself, I was nervous too. I was scared to get on a bike, but every therapeutic practitioner was like, get back on that bike. Um, so I did. they're like, try to get back to all your regular things, but.

That changed because in those moments post accident, my normal was completely disrupted. I used to work out every day, whether it was biking, running, uh, yoga. I couldn't do any of those anymore because not only did I have a head injury, I also had an neck injury. And that's one of the things [00:16:00] scientifically that I've learned most recently that women experience concussion differently because their necks are not as strong.

So when we hit our head or we have any type of whiplash, it's just not quite as secure. And also women experience concussion differently 'cause women's brains are more sensitive. And women also have all of the hormonal chemicals. So that impacts concussion, which I'm only just learning now four and a half years later.

Andrea: Wow.

Jocelyn: So there's science, there's research, there's all the things that I'm finding out. But the bottom line to your question, I feel, is I've had to entirely transform my way of life because I could not do. What I used to do, I could not work out, drive my kids, go to their activities, work, be on a screen. I couldn't do all those things.

I could do one of those things and one of those things with little limited capacity. So I shifted from this whole, uh, triathlete energy expulsion hours of training to going for walks. And I [00:17:00] described it in like the early days as I feel like I'm just existing.

Andrea: Mm.

Jocelyn: So there was a pain underneath it as

Andrea: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Jocelyn: will I ever get back to, and no, I will never get back to that version of myself.

'cause now I am a different version of myself.

Andrea: So in great loss, there is transformation into a new being,

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: which is who you are now.

Jocelyn: Yeah.

Krista: May, may I ask how old your kids were and where you were in your marriage when this happened?

Jocelyn: Um, so when I had my cycling accident, my kids were, um, 16, 14 8, and I am divorced.

Krista: You were already [00:18:00] divorced by then? Mm-hmm.

Jocelyn: I've been divorced for 10 years. Yeah. So,

Krista: How did you move through those days, raising three kids? I mean, they were a bit older. I mean,I have twins that are nine and they can do things, they're not efficient and they need some guidance, but, um, I'm just wondering how they were with you and how you were moving through the daily with them around you and how, how did that go?

Jocelyn: Honestly, I don't remember how I navigated. So I have a partner, um, and he's a phenomenal support. We don't live together, so, so I was on, on my own typically when I had the kids. Um, they go to their dad. So that was a, a, a break and a reprive for me to rest. But [00:19:00] I truthfully

I did not have an idea. I had no idea how to recover from a concussion because nobody is talking, there is no one hub that you go to and they're like, here's how you recover when you hit your head. I literally had to pull together every single type of practitioner from a physiotherapist to chiropractors to a TMJ clinic to a dental surgeon.

'cause I was missing my teeth to a neuro optometrist 'cause my eyes were a mess, uh, to neurologist at the hospital. 'cause my nerves in my neck are still damaged. Um, and the list can go on.

Andrea: Extraordinary.

Jocelyn: And so I honestly, somebody asked me this recently, how were your kids during that time? And I'm like, I don't actually know, like what they thought, how they felt. My face was absolutely mangled. So it was visual. Um,

Andrea: Visual.

Jocelyn: it was very visual. it's probably was scary for them. Um, [00:20:00] but I

did what I could, driving them around to their things. My son played hockey, so the white lights and the ice. I would wear my sunglasses in his hockey games, like stuff like that. Driving, I would feel sick, but I would still do it. Um, so there was a bit of muscling through, but on the other side there was an absolute new version of me 'cause I wasn't able to do all the other things. So,

Andrea: Mm-hmm.

Jocelyn: and I became very diligent with everything. So I stopped drinking in entirety because it's a neuroinflammatory and impacts your brain. I started super clean eating and I'd already been a clean eater because I was trying to make sure that the brain was getting the best nutrients and then I had to just sleep, like whatever my body needed, I let it, so I didn't set an alarm unless it was to get the kids to school.

Um, on the days that I had them in those types of like really foundational care types of things. Um, so I don't know if that answers the question [00:21:00] of how I did it. 'cause I feel like it

Krista: Yeah. Well,

Andrea: it really does.

Krista: it, it does answer because it puts me in a place of understanding where you were and painting that picture of your daily.

Jocelyn: So my version of balance and recovery was different. It wasn't like a daily thing. It was more like a bi-weekly thing or a weekly thing. I would schedule my time differently. And you know, the funny, the craziest universal thing about all of this is I had my accident one month to the day after I started my master's in the psychology and neuroscience of mental health.

So that I put on

Krista: Wow.

Jocelyn: so that I put on hold. I'm like, okay, I can't do that. And this and the kids.

Krista: Nope.

Andrea: Oh my goodness. That's wild. That's another piece.

Krista: you just mentioned the word balance. I have strong feelings about that word, which I don't need to share, but I'm curious to hear from you what that word means and when you [00:22:00] think of balance, what that looks like. Hmm.

Jocelyn: I guessthe way that I refer to it as like managing capacity. Managing capacity on a moment to moment, day by day, week by week process. So really it's about what's my capacity today? What am I able to do that feels healthy and well and right. And what is just gonna have to wait? And so for me that word really means capacity management, which means energy management.

Andrea: love that. That's amazing.

Krista: I love that too. And here's why I think there is so much pressure put on that word, especially with women to balance. Everything. How is that even possible? So your description [00:23:00] literally made my shoulders drop and gave me permission to sit into the moment, because we can't have everything perfect.

We can't balance everything. I personally don't think it's possible, but we can maybe split it up if that's the right wording. compartmentalize those moments, Even sometimes when you're in the first stages of a brain injury, for example, like you don't have the capacity to do much of anything.

at what point did you realize that's what balance meant to you?

Jocelyn: So I'm a super high achiever. I don't know, if it's gone or what's happening with it, but that is my undercurrent. I'm really trying to balance or manage my capacity or create more alignment in my life so there's more flow. Um, my, one of my best friends said to me, you can have it all, [00:24:00] you just can't have it all at once. 'cause I was trying to have it all at once, and that really resonated. And I was like, well, what do you mean? I wanna have it all at once. I want to do all the things. I love living, I love life, I love experiencing stuff. But that moment was kind of like.

Well, because I also landed in the hospital with burnout because I was pushing too hard. That was before the accident. So when you ask that question, it's like, I just have to learn everything the fricking hard way. Um, but that's what, I've been learningslowly, until it's become more of an integrative way of living.

And I think the brain injury was like, okay, you're not listening, lady, so we're gonna slow you down in a way that you're gonna hear us because we've been trying to give you subtle messages and you're not tuning in. So here's a big message, because now you have no choice but to slow down. And so from there, it's like, okay, now I have to manage my capacity.

And it has to be very, very intentional.

Krista: So I'm [00:25:00] hearing intuition coming in here. The word balance and capacity, all swirling into each other

Andrea: Mm-hmm.

Krista: Navigating that altogether.

Jocelyn: Yeah.

Andrea: The other thing that is, starting tobubble to the surface is how, in tune, you are with yourself

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: and how in tune you are with your body.

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: And even though you don't always listen to the body and the self, it's not because you actually don't know that's what is coming up, is that you have such a deep sense of your path and your vision and your goals and you can feel your body when it's tired.

You need to give it sleep and you need to let it sleep when you need to [00:26:00] eat the right things, you go and you eat those things that your body wants. And Because of your extraordinary drive to have it all at once. Some of those things didn't serve that.

And some of these experiences that have unfolded have maybe been moments where something bigger has said, you're not listening to what you already know.

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: And this is going to give you pause to listen to what you already know in a different way. Maybe not in the way that you had planned, but it's gonna open up something different for you

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: to focus on.

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: did I capture that in a way that feels aligned? Yeah.

Jocelyn: Yeah, for sure.

Andrea: Did you find, because in this path of all of these experiences and [00:27:00] challenges that have occurred,

was there always a book in there as well, or was that born of late of the new Jocelyn that now exists?

Jocelyn: Yeah. No, there was definitely not always a book. I mean, we all have a story within us, and so those of us who choose to put it in a book format. Do. So mine is just a version of, my own journey. However, it was not always there. Actually in July, 2024 is when I made the decision to write a book because I was out being my visionary self.

And I don't feel like people were ready for the message I was sharing, which is very a common experience for me because I'm moving too quickly so that I'm already onto the next thing by the time the message is getting heard. actually, somebody that I worked with around my business and branding was [00:28:00] like

It could take up to five years. People hearing things seven times before they get your message and it fully sinks in. So you have to keep repeating. So for someone like me, visionary, but also fast moving, it's like this is another version of slow down. So I had all this insight, I had all this information, I had all this learning.

I had graduated from my master's, so I went back after eight months, because it was so important to me. I had all this information and I was like, the world needs to know about this. And my humanitarian self wanted more people to have more access to the concept that I created and the way that I look at mental health, because as you can hear from my story, my master's is rooted in science and I had never been a science person, but I really wanted to understand my why for parts of my story.

We haven't even gotten into the actual mental health, the depression, the anxiety, but then I had the brain health. So then I wanted to know [00:29:00] more about what was happening, happening in the stress of my brain. So that was my master's was, understanding the neuroinflammatory bio markers in the brain.

Uh, regular working age adults, and the impact that that has and how do we mitigate that experience? And so I wanted to write this book because I thought it was an accessible way for more people to get this concept for their mental and emotional and spiritual wellbeing, physical wellbeing, to really support them on the journey.

Because we are having a mental health crisis and not everybody has access to all the things that I had access to. So by bringing it into a book, I can share all the things I have access to, and it's accessible for everybody, all the folks on the planet. Um. So that's last, July 2024,

Was the jumping off point. And the book [00:30:00] launched last May, 2025 in world Mental Health Month. And it's been beautiful. It's been a beautiful experience of sharing because every time I get one little piece of feedback from a talk, from a reader who just picked up my book, however they found it, I get messages.

Mm-hmm. To say thank you. I have tears in eyes coming up with no words, just to say thank you. I have people that can express themselves, so I know that putting the book in the world was the right decision and I'm really glad I did it. But never in my whole life did I think I was an author. Or did I want to be an author?

But here I am. And to be honest with you, I feel like I probably would do another one. I really, really enjoyed it and I have more research I wanna do. So whether that's in the form of a PhD or another book or both, whatever, uh, I'll cross that bridge when it [00:31:00] comes. But I have more research I wanna do 'cause I have that deeply curious side of myself where I just wanna know why, and I wanna show research and statistics to help humanity. And my mission is to help humanity have a better quality of life.

Andrea: Wow. You just said something as well that just felt like such a moment. You said, I'll cross that bridge when it comes. And you had shared with us that after your brain injury, one of the things that you couldn't do was cross a bridge.

Jocelyn: Oh wow. I feel like I could cry with that. Yeah, it's so true.

Andrea: Right? So that's such an interesting piece of the language that you're using. In some ways, metaphorically around crossing the bridges that maybe sometimes we don't feel like we can cross, [00:32:00] or at the time that they show up, they feel uncrossable. But that there is a way across the bridge when we have the right tools and the right community and the right information or access to the information. So that's what just came up as I was listening to your,

Krista: And, and also what can happen after you cross the bridge

Andrea: Mm-hmm.

Krista: whenever that timing is what happens after

Jocelyn: Yes. I love that. I love how you both just brought that metaphor to life because it speaks to everybody.

Andrea: Of course.

Jocelyn: all of us a point where it's, we're sitting there staring at a bridge. Do we wanna cross? Do we not wanna cross? Are we gonna cross it at 20 kilometers an hour? Like I was, uh. How are we gonna get over that bridge and figuring that out?

How [00:33:00] important is it? Like how, yeah. I just love how you brought that all

Andrea: You also touched on, the mental health crisis, whether it's, with themselves personally, or with somebody that they love, or somebody that's close to them.

And your recognition of how deeply depression and anxiety run, through the world now with everything that people are navigating.

How has mental health, been a part of your own lived experience, and now living into your current

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: life as Jocelyn at 47.

Jocelyn: Beautiful. Thank you. Um, so in the medical community, there's three pivotal moments that women experience a decrease in mental health or struggles with their mental health. Um, puberty. So that's both genders or all the genders uh, pregnancy. If women are blessed. [00:34:00] To have that or choose to have that, um, in perimenopause.

So the three Ps in women's health, those really defined me and my journey with depression and anxiety, and also emotional suppression, which is super common for women and men. Women tend to struggle with depression and anxiety, and men tend to suppress their emotions and internalize things, and they typically go to addictions and suicide.

So that's just research in general. Um, women are taking it all in, taking it all on. And also there's this conversation from, in internalization versus externalization perspective of our emotions. Women typically internalize. Um, and generally speaking, um, from research, men are more external. Like it's just, it's out.

You know, it's like, boys are more, will have a little fight and tussle on the playground and girls will use mean [00:35:00] words, but then they'll cry about it or internalize it. So when I think about how teenagers are even navigating it, I can see, you know, from the research and from my own lived experience.

But, so my experience with both anxiety was depression, was sadness because I wasn't where I wanted to be. I was internalizing the people's emotions that were around me and their poor mental health. Because I am this sensitive being and the intuitive way that I am as a person, I was not only sad and upset in my own experiences, but I was also absorbing the sadness and poor mental health of others around me.

That was like a double doozy. And so I really struggled through that part. Um, and that was a life navigation up until recently. Um, because I've now got all the tools that I [00:36:00] found piece by piece in order to write the book. 'cause everything in the book was how I literally did claim my own brain, depression, anxiety, physical brain from the accident.

And so I shared some of the research about how the depression and anxiety are manifesting, the internalization, the externalization. I've lived it, I've experienced it. And it's also in the research and the statistics. Right now, I think there's too much information out there. People have too much.

We're not meant to see the amount that we see. You know, when we think about tribes and we go back to ancient wisdom or older times, it's like we knew what was going on in our tribe and that's what mattered. and that's what our brains had capacity for. Yeah. And now our brains are being exposed to, you know, news.

Okay? So what's going on in our community? What's going on in the news? So there's the next generation, and now we're exposed to global suffering, global experiences. Um, you can be connected to anyone, anywhere, globally 24 7. And it's [00:37:00] putting our brains way over capacity from what we're biologically programmed to do.

And so when I speak today, what is causing depression and anxiety and addiction, and suicide or whatever those manifestations are, is a compromise in our foundational safety. So. There's, economic crisis. There's political, there's war, there's all the types of war, but we're all dialed into it all the time. and that is just too much. And so that basic Maslow's hierarchy of needs, I talk about this in organizations all the time around change management initiatives around, money and mental health.

And talking about this week, the foundational security piece is like food, water, shelter, a roof over our head, a job that provides those things. and if all of that is being compromised, our foundational structure and safety is being compromised. And when we [00:38:00] think about that from the brain evolution perspective, our brain is evolutionarily wired to keep us safe.

That first part of brain formation, that primal part of brain formation is made to keep us safe, but now we're being charged with, it's not just like the tiger we're trying to escape from. All the things coming at us. And it's like our brain doesn't even know what's going on because it's trying to keep us safe, but there's so much threat.

So when I'm speaking, I'm giving people tips and tools and strategies on how they can mitigate, navigate some of those things. Because the over exposure to information, to suffering beyond our tribe, to all of the things, it's great to have perspective, but it's also having a very negative impact. And our brains are literally just back to over capacity that creates anxiety.

Anxiety is fear of the future. Depression can be sadness for [00:39:00] where we're at or regret from the past. Um, and that just keeps increasing. There's just this level of uncertainty because humans by nature wanna be in control and we don't have anything, we can't control any of it except for ourselves. So when they're exposed to too much, but we can't control any of it, and we have to come back to what we can control as ourself.

That is where I see the depression, the anxiety, the mental health crisis, um, for everybody. All people.

Andrea: Mm-hmm. That was a really helpful and clear way to understand, where we're currently at

And Krista and I talk about this a lot, but this why gatherings or collectives or conversations like this, spaces that you are creating in your studies and in your book and [00:40:00] in your speaking events, it's in those places that we're allowing people to recognize that it's not just them.

That they're not just sitting in that by themselves and that this is being felt by a globe of humans. because there is so much comfort in knowing you're not alone. and. some of the things that you've talked about perhaps has highlighted how not being alone is part of your own journey.

Your friends that you've referenced, having your children and your family, your parents, you've referenced. So being part of a community of people and then also having access to others in a safe place where there's information and connection feels like one of [00:41:00] the accessible ways for us to combat this.

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: Mental health crisis.

Jocelyn: hmm.

Andrea: So I really appreciate you being able to walk us through this lived experience, which is so powerful as well.

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: Um, 'cause then we're not being talked at as well, isn't it? That's what I find is that I feel so connected. to the people that we end up in conversation with. Even when I'm not maybe as similar to somebody that I'm speaking with, that doesn't even matter. The fact that we're in conversation and somebody sharing their own lived experience where I can connect to something they say and go, oh my gosh, I totally felt the same way that she just described.

All of a sudden it doesn't matter that we're very different individuals or that we have very different stories. There's that moment where you recognize that despite us all being unique and having our [00:42:00] own storiesand everything being unto itself, we're still deeply, deeply connected by so much of the humanity but it's because we don't share it or have a place to share it, that we're just living with our own ideas that we're by ourselves.

Jocelyn: Ugh. I love

Krista: I wonder if there's a piece in there that you could talk on

Jocelyn: Hmm.

Krista: about the invisible part of all of this. When people look at you, when people don't know you, when people kind of know you, they look at you and they probably just assume everything's fine and you're functioning at full capacity. But I'm curious to hear you speak a little bit about that invisibility.

Jocelyn: Thank you. That's beautiful. So that was part of one of the lines that I've brought into conversation [00:43:00] is I was silently holding it all together while silently falling apart, masking it. Overachieving. And here's the interesting thing. When I went to write my story, I had a really hard time reconciling the privilege and the beautiful life that I have with the undercurrent of struggling with my mental health.

I felt guilty and I was like, how did I not, how did I, how did, how did any of this happen? Um,

yeah, it's very emotional to reconcile that piece because this is so common where humans are out there making snap judgments, snap [00:44:00] perspectives, snap decisions about people. And they have no idea what they're going through on their inner world. And so it's such a huge component. And I didn't tell my family I was writing this book until six months into the writing because I was so nervous to be that vulnerable.

I was so nervous. I was so aware of what I wanted to say and I wanted to maintain confidentiality and I wanted to honor my, my own journey and honor everybody else's journey because that's their story to tell. But the writing of the story and then reading it to my mom and dad and then their acceptance, permission, pride was really incredible.

'cause I had no idea how [00:45:00] everything was gonna come together. But I say that all because it took me six months to verbalize to like more people than probably three that I was doing this. And everybody was like, wait a second, you didn't say anything about writing a book this year. I'm like, yeah, I, I wasn't sure because the vulnerability level was so high, and I am so grateful that I did, because exactly what you said, people are suffering in silence, judging themselves and shame and guilt in like, just wonder of, is it just me?

It's not, I share my story for people to create connection, to have community, to know they're not alone, to know they're understood. Because lots of times people who are high functioning, you think it's all got it together. We're [00:46:00] all navigating something inside and we don't talk about it enough.

And so if there's one thing for people to know, like what Andrea said is we're not alone. And, you're wise intuition here of what's happening on the outside versus what's happening on the inside. It doesn't always manifest the way we think. And so mental health is happening for all of us.

And this is the thing, our stress tolerance system is built from the womb. It is built from the environment we are housed in as babies. Whatever our mothers are experiencing all the way through our early years, our most formative years, our teenage years, any type of life experiences that people are going through.

So when we look around with compassion and I get people to do these types of [00:47:00] exercises together, it's like really deeply connect with one another. 'cause it's like, oh, hey, how are you? Uh oh yeah, I'm good. Great. Okay. It's very transactional. Nothing is deep about it. There's nothing real about that

The part of me that's the deep part is wanting more of that deep connection. Deep knowing, deep understanding. And the only way we get there is by having these conversations.

Andrea: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Krista: And being brave enough to share your story I'm just really grateful. it's not easy and I mean, you, are a keynote speaker. You share your story, you're sharing it probably now more than ever because you have this book as something to give to people to take home and pick up and get. Um, but it's not always easy to share your story. And I know [00:48:00] for a fact that everybody that's listening is relating to this on some level, whether it's personally or someone that they know very deeply.

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Krista: And It's really brave of you. And I don't know if that registers with you right now or anymore, or I don't know, but it, but I'm grateful for you to be able to share it.

Yeah. With us and with the people that are listening. Thank you.

Jocelyn: Yeah. Thank you.

Krista: Community is everything. It pulls us all together. It's, we need it. We need it now more than ever.

Jocelyn: Yes. We need it

Krista: we can get in person with each other, you know, Andrea and I are realizing that almost every day we have these connections and we talk every day. We text, we voicemail, we call, we FaceTime, we whatever, you

Andrea: All the things.

Krista: and, you know, that's one little piece of our community, but we are [00:49:00] really feeling our community build bigger.

And a big part of that is being in person. Whether that's one person or five, or 50 or 2000, that's also a thing too,

Andrea: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I so appreciate the aspect of, being vulnerable and what that can do for people, particularly when you see yourself or your personal narrative, is that you can take care of whatever comes up because you feel as though you are

Jocelyn: Hmm.

Andrea: resilient and strong capable.

I've got this. And when you build that vision. Of that being who you are, that you think that other people also see you that way to then be vulnerable and say, I need help.[00:50:00]

Jocelyn: Hmm.

Andrea: I can't do this. I'm scared. I don't have everything together

That is very deeply connected to so many women in particular that we are meant to be equipped to be able to handle everything and then just keep going. Over the next bridge. And for there to be people like yourself

able to share that is what is going to incrementally shift all of us being able to do the same thing.

Jocelyn: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: hearing it said out loud so beautifully. Like you've, shared with both your lived and now you're learned combined, which is such a magical combination

And It [00:51:00] brings so much hope for everybody that, oh my gosh, okay. My story. One, it counts. Two, there are

communities and connections for everybody in what they're experiencing. And there are bridges, but they're crossable.

Jocelyn: Yeah.

And the other side is beautiful and there's hope on the other side. Yeah.

Andrea: I love that.

Krista: is there anything else you wanted to share with our listeners or with us before we say see you next time?

Jocelyn: I wanna say thank you for holding such a beautiful space to have these real conversations. I want. Every single listener to know that they're [00:52:00] not alone and that whatever your experience is present day, you can change that. And it's not always an easy journey. However, the other side of the bridge is rewarding, um, is aligned, can offer so much that we might not be able to see.

And so you can turn your pain into purpose, whether that's small or global, however you choose. But you're not alone. And we're in this all together because mental health is not a a them, it's a, we we're in this together and I think one of the things Andrea and I talked about in our initial conversation is that 1% ripple.

By me sharing my story, if I can have 1% ripple [00:53:00] on the listeners, on people who pick up the book on any conversation that I have, that Ripple continues because I am me and I ripple into my family. I ripple into my communities. I ripple out through this community. But we can all have a 1% ripple. And when we all make that choice, it positively impacts each one of us.

So whether it's me struggling or somebody in my family struggling, or any listeners struggling or somebody in their family struggling am we have all got this and we're not alone and we're in it together because mental health is a we, not a me.

Krista: Thank you. So grateful for you. Thanks for sharing your story and your time with us. Um, where can people get your book?

Jocelyn: Yeah, [00:54:00] so Claim Your Brain is available at all major online book retailers so they can get the book there. And it's available in paperback and digital books. And it's not yet available in audio?

Krista: Oh, not yet. Is there a plan for that?

Andrea: yet.

Jocelyn: There is,

Krista: Oh, that's

Andrea: That's exciting And maybe, to niggle into that one comment. Can you tell us what's next? Jocelyn? Because the future is where we also want to talk.

Jocelyn: Oh my God, so many things are next. I was actually reflecting last week 'cause I've had some, some people on, I had a really amazing week last week and I was connecting with lots of folks who are so inspiring and supportive. So I have found the communities that I want to be in.

Andrea: love this.

Jocelyn: Beautiful. Because I have had people in the past years say [00:55:00] to me, you are just in a negative way

Andrea: Oh

Jocelyn: Isn't that interesting? And so when you

Andrea: We don't want just

Jocelyn: no, never.

Andrea: No,

Jocelyn: But here's where I went with it. I am just beginning.

Andrea: Oh.

Krista: Oh, that is a beautiful reframe. Mic drop. There we go. Thank you. You.

Andrea: yes, Jocelyn. I, yes, I am just beginning. Thank you.

Jocelyn: Yeah.

Krista: Oh my gosh, good Did you actually say that out loud? Did you stop somebody and like be like, oh, thank you so much for that. And here

Jocelyn: I dunno, I didn't, because I don't act that fast. I'm very, I need to think like in the depth. I'm a deep thinker and this has taken me like a year and a half to come up with that rebuttal.

Krista: Fair. No, that's fair. But

Andrea: Now you need to circle back. You need to go search out whoever said that.

Krista: No one's gonna say it to you anymore. Now that you know it, you're like, that lesson was for me.

Andrea: Oh, I love

Jocelyn: So that is [00:56:00] what's next for, I don't know what's next for me. I mean, I have so many visions. I am, I am speaking more, I am impacting more lives. I am on a mission to improve the quality of life for humanity, and I am just beginning.

Krista: I just got all the, all the shivers full body. There we go. Okay.

Andrea: Mm-hmm. Thank you both. Beautiful.

Krista: Thank you.

Jocelyn: Um, okay. But I do wanna just to add to the book and where people can find you, um, where can they find you? Are you on LinkedIn? Are you on Instagram? What is your choice of, um, connection?

Great. So my website is trueliving.ca, so T-R-U-L-I-V-I-N g.ca that has access to the book, Instagram, LinkedIn [00:57:00] connections. And so I would say those are the three platforms where you can best reach me, our website has, contact us, so if you wanna direct message me, that's how it can come through or through Instagram is trueliving.ca and then my LinkedIn is Jocelyn Pepe.

Krista: Fantastic. And if someone wants to book you as their keynote speaker, they can do that all through your website as well.

Jocelyn: They can, yes, there is a f for, to reach out to me directly to book or have a conversation about what you are looking for.

Krista: Fantastic. Thank you so much for joining us today and of course, for our listeners, you can always find us, on Instagram at Half Betty, and both Andrea and I are on LinkedIn and our website, halfbetty.com. We would love to hear from you, especially if this episode, um, really resonated with you.

Please share it, use it as a tool to connect with someone that you love and keep this conversation going. Thanks for joining us [00:58:00] today.