The Desvarieux Sisters Ep.17

[00:00:00]

Krista: My name is Krista Gruen I'm the producer and co-host alongside Andrea Rathborne, our founder and host. Today we are sitting down with two bold and vibrant creative sisters, Jess and Moonie, who are the duo behind sharp boundary pushing comedy.

Jess, a former Time Magazine award-winning journalist, turned screenwriter and director, and Moonie lawyer turned standup comedian, actor and TV film writer have built a creative partnership rooted in humor and heart. Together, they co-created the award-winning web series. Moonie dubbed the black queer Seinfeld, which was nominated for a Queeries Award and screened at over a dozen international festivals.

They also co-wrote the comedic feature, Butch Baby Mama, A finalist In Stage 32's best comedic screenplay competition and selected for TIFF's Inside Out Finance Forum where they pitched to executives from Netflix, Neon, and [00:01:00] A24. Beyond film and TV, Jess and Moonie host A Good Laugh, a podcast exploring how comedy can be both healing and a form of resistance.

Jess and Moonie, welcome to the Half Betty Podcast.

Jess: Oh my gosh, Krista!

Moonie: Yeah, Thank You so much having us.

Jess: Thank you. What a bio. That was really beautiful. I, I wanna have that play every I wake up in the morning. That just remind you like,

Krista: isn't it nice to hear it back? It's so cause like you send it out and then you don't really read it right. Like why would you read your bio? But when you hear it spoken out loud, it's such a nice treat and it's all true. And that's not, that's not the only thing you've accomplished. There's so much more to talk about.

We're gonna get into it. But first, so Andrea is meeting you for the first time, but we met months ago and I was wondering if you wanna tag team the story about how we met back in June.

Moonie: Yes. So Jess and I attended, Banff, media Festival in, [00:02:00] Banff, Canada. and I mean, if anyone's ever been there, it's like living in a postcard. one of our mottos is, go where it's warm, and Canadians, the Moonie, the web series, got into the, T.O. Web Fest, in Toronto and we have just made so many contacts just from, from that appearance and, um, Canadians. Really love us and we love them back.

Jess: Get us. They get us. Yes.

Moonie: Yeah. And uh, we, we met Krista on the red carpet, I think in front of a step and repeat, and we just hit it off and we

Jess: I think we had asked you to, if you could take our picture,

Krista: I offered.

Jess: you offered of course, as a like a good Canadian,

Moonie: so Canadian. That was so

Jess: and sweet.

Krista: who's gonna take your picture? I was like, there's no one else around you right now. Like, you need help. What's going on? How can I help?

Moonie: right, right.

Jess: it. Yeah. And then,

Moonie: it off. We talked about life, death, pivoting, just everything [00:03:00] under the sun.

Krista: within like five, the first five minutes of meeting each other. Yeah. Jess being a little social butterfly,

Jess: then you told us about your amazing podcast. Yeah. And we're like, wow, your podcast sounds amazing. And it was Half Betty. And I was like, is that like half a supermodel? Like you, do you remember in Clueless that line? Like, oh, she's a total Betty. Like she's beautiful, she's hot.

Krista: so funny. Oh my

Jess: was like, what does this mean?

Krista: Uhhuh.

Jess: And then you explained the connection to Betty White and I was like, that's brilliant.

Andrea: Krista told me the story of meeting and how powerful it was, and her energy when she was talking about the two of you, was all I need to know.

So thank Jess. Thank you Moonie.

I'm so thrilled that the two of you have joined us today, and I can't wait to learn more because I feel like I've already got enough that I could run away and just be completely satisfied.

So now I get to look forward to there being even more that we get to unpack and hear from you,

Jess: go container 'cause Moonie and I have a lot,

Krista: [00:04:00] And to go container.

Jess: to unload. Andrea,

Krista: Okay, so listen, Um, we wanna hear your five words,

And tell us a little bit about these words that you have that describe who you are. Who wants to go first?

Moonie: Um, I'll go first. Oh.

Krista: Moonie.

Jess: Yes, please. Go for us. Go for it. Moon.

Moonie: So a contract that I have with myself and the world is that I'm a powerful, loving and connected leader, and I've branched that into entertainer, um, just in this journey. Um, but to add two more words to that would be, I'm an empath, and visionary.

Krista: Mm, yes. I felt that when I met you. Your energy is very grounded. It's very calm. It's very kind. I felt all of that. is it something that happens when we get older where we can really see ourself more clearly?

[00:05:00] Would you have been able to tell me all those words 20 years ago?

Moonie: Um, I think it's edibles

Krista: a different person too,

Moonie: Edibles really calm me down. Uh, I'm just like, oh, there's bullshit over there. I don't care. I'm enjoying myself. Like, yeah. What the, uh, um, it's, it's work. it's constant work on myself. I was incredibly shy as a child, dare I say, dangerously shy as a little girl. Um, and just working on myself.

I'm a seeker. I'm constantly looking for ways to elevate and expand as a spirit because I recognize that I'm a spiritual being, having a human experience. And so I'm really intentional about getting better, getting stronger, elevating, because that's and growing. That's why we're here. That's part of why we're here.

Aside from loving one another and seeing one another, seeing the God within each other. Because if we saw the God in within each other, we would treat each [00:06:00] other accordingly. But unfortunately a lot of people, don't follow that way of being. and so it, it's work, it's constant work, constant awareness.

Um, elevating my awareness muscle. because I'm not perfect. I'm a hot head. Talk to my girlfriend.

Krista: Okay. All right. We're gonna have her on next. Actually, we have a surprise guest

Moonie: You need like a three hour block of time.

Krista: Yeah,

Andrea: We've done that. We've done that. It can be a one two part series.

Krista: Yeah,

Moonie: all, get all the exs, get all the exs and my present girlfriend.

Krista: at

Andrea: There we go.

Moonie: Yeah.

Krista: the truth will come out. Oh my gosh. Ah, that's cool. That's cool. Thank you for sharing. Thank you.

Andrea: Um, Moonie I wrote down, the words that you were saying because they were so beautiful andas I was listening, there was such an ease and a flow to the way that you expressed these words.

Does it feel as though you're in a flow or does it feel like you're in that state where that really does truly resonate [00:07:00] with who you are? I'm curious.

Moonie: Yeah. yes. I started really pursuing personal development, spiritual development. Um. let's say around 2007, um, when I started law school, before that, the first time I applied to law school, applied to 13 schools. I didn't get in and it was devastating for me.

Um, but I took it like a champ and I learned from it. And so I was like, okay, I'm gonna get back up. And I was very fortunate I was able to quit my job as a paralegal at the time, and my mom was like, came to pick me up within my box at, from Dixie and Shapiro in Manhattan on Sixth Avenue of Americas. And, um, she was like, okay, you're gonna go study for that LSAT and that's what I did seven days a week. And through that process, I developed faith, faith in myself. My confidence and faith in a higher power, and I just never looked back. It, it's, it's, I, I, I'm [00:08:00] at a really great place that I'm proud of, but I also recognize that I'm a work in progress and there's, I will forever be growing until I take my last breath.

That's the goal. That's the intention.

Andrea: Mm mm I love that. that's wonderful because I can see since 2007, have layered on all of these learnings and all of these takeaways and all of these experiences

were grounded in something that was real and tangible. so thank you for sharing where you feel that you got to.it was beautiful,

Jess: can I just add one thing too, is that I think that flow that you heard, Andrea, is the fact that Moonie's not just saying it like she literally, if you go to her bedroom. There is a wall with this plastered in big, bold letters of who she is. I might be too revealing here, Moon, but in the mirror, as she looks at herself in the morning, she sees those words, she visualizes those words, they become internalized.

if you wanna talk more about this Moon, I hope I'm not revealing too much, but I think [00:09:00] that's a big part of all of that. Why it just flows like that for you.

Moonie: for sure. it's constant reminders because Jess introduced this wonderful, this just this re refrain. I've made it a refrain in my life. you have to follow the signal and ignore the noise. And so there's so much noise around us, so many distractions, you know, I mean, we live in America.

I mean, we have the biggest distraction, you know, in the White House. and, it's something that we have to be aware of and resist and speak up in the small and big ways. Um, but it's that signal. It's that north star that your intuition, right, this just following that inner compass and you have to always remind yourself because there's so much noise because there's so many distractions competing for your attention.

Krista: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Andrea: that's really well said. And the fact that you. Live those words. You live and breathe and you are [00:10:00] truly grounded in who you are. Having the the visual reminder is really interesting because we are also bombarded visually every day with so much that our brains are trying to navigate, decipher, constantly look for something that is gonna hurt us.

Like we're constantly searching for. Is this bad? Is this bad? Is this is gonna be harmful? So in all of that, to give ourselves. Exactly what you've described, which is a lighthouse, which is an anchor, which is a reminder in a visual form, really just helps our poor brains just come back to that place every time and say, Nope, there are the words.

That's what I am. They're real. They're right in front of you,

Jess: it's almost like a billboard, right? The fact that we leave our homes and we

Andrea: Yeah.

Jess: are inundated with advertisement. You have to, in your own space, have billboards for [00:11:00] yourself to build yourself up, advertise how you are the bomb,

Andrea: Yes,

Jess: things, this is who you are. You need, it's like you have to be Madison Avenue in your own home.

And say, I am going to put it out there that I am the bomb and I have all of these abilities and these skills and remind myself of these things. it's imperative because once you leave your home, everyone is gonna tell you how much you lack. You lack beauty, your hair's not straight enough.

And that's why there's that advertisement. Oh, you're not skinny enough. That's why there's that advertisement. You know, it's, it's strategic because the way capitalism works is if you were to really say to yourself, oh, I have everything I need, you wouldn't need to buy anything to fill in that lack. So when you enter your home, it's a strategy to say, I'm gonna make sure that I'm in surplus in my confidence.

And that those visual reminders will do that for you.

Moonie: And affirmations. I'm big vision [00:12:00] boards and affirmations.

Jess: Yeah.

Krista: It's almost, and forgive me for making this sound, trite or whatever, but like it's almost childlike. Like to go back to those moments when you're so pure and you're just living your life and you're dancing wherever and you're jumping and you're twirling and you're getting dirty and you're picking up rocks and digging in the sand and all those things like that.

That's us at our purest form, and I think it's so easy to lose who we are with all of that you're talking about over the years. The jobs, the pressure, the school, the family, and then all the marketing that's coming at us, social media, all the things, right? So yeah, what you're saying is totally resonating with me, for sure.

Jess: Yeah, and I, I have two little ones. I have a 4-year-old and an 8-year-old, and their biggest lessons to me is play Mom.

Krista: yes, yes.

Jess: play. And there is something, I don't know when it happens, but we start to believe

Krista: Hmm.

Jess: that play is not [00:13:00] valuable. It is actually the most important thing you can do, right? Because that's forming connection, that's forming bond. It's just low stakes play. And that's

Andrea: Oh, I love that.

Jess: Moonie and I decided like as creatives, like we get to play, we get to make worlds with our minds, and then have them come to life on the page. And then on the stage when she performs her standup and eventually movies and our, our web series, it all just started in our mind imaginations.

Krista: Jess. I wanna hear your words, and then I wanna get back into the writing, because that's where your heart is. And that is just the most exciting part of what I wanna talk about today, because it just, it's fueling where you are right now. So, Jess, will you share some of your words that make you stand out,

I wanna dig into your brain and see where you're at.

Jess: I love that you wanna dig into my brain? Oh my gosh, it's mush. It's a lot of mush.

Moonie: Get ready. Roll those sleeves up.

Jess: [00:14:00] Um, I have also visual representations I learned from my big sis. Um, and the most powerful words I think in the English language are I am and I have a poster that I made I got it printed and it says I am brave. I call it like the BRCA test, if you know, um, anything about genetic testing,

Krista: Uh, a little bit, but tell me more. I'm, I'm leaning in.

Jess: you have a positive, um, uh, BRCA gene, um, it's considered to be, quote unquote an indicator, um, that you are more likely to develop breast cancer. And, our mom actually passed from breast cancer, so I had to get that test done. And I remember being on pins and needles, you know, knowing that when she was diagnosed, she had stage four cancer.

She got diagnosed in June. By April she had passed. Um, so I took her really seriously. I was like, okay, what these results will show is gonna be really revealing about what my life is gonna be [00:15:00] like. So I kind of, this is, it was really just by coincidence. I was coming up with adjectives for myself. And what stood out was brave, resilient, authentic, compassionate, and.

The, that's, and that's the BRCA test.

Krista: Yeah.

Jess: I am going to live by these words and not die by that test. And I was like, that is going to be my signal that what I'm doing, if I'm leading with those, those adjectives, those parts of myself, I cannot go wrong. and I've been tested, and that's the beauty of age.

That's why I love this podcast. Half Betty. if I came up with those words when I was 20, it would've been an aspiration at the age of 40. I'm gonna be 41. it's a declaration. Because I know I have been there. like, my mom would say the record. Right. I have a [00:16:00] record.

And the facts have shown that when stuff gets hard receipts. Exactly. I get up when someone's being bullied or someone is being intimidated. I put myself out there. I am brave when I am told, uh, Jessica, you know, this is not gonna work for us. We need you to be a certain way. It, that, that was the long, that was probably the hardest lesson, A lesson I work on daily about not being a people pleaser.

I, I lead with my authentic self, And compassion and a heart. And I have a larger purpose. Moonie and I have a larger purpose. We wanna do amazing things in Haiti. We want to build schools, build hospitals, and we have that compassion for people. So. it's literally a declaration. Um, every morning when I wake up, I am brave, resilient, authentic, compassionate.

I am, I am. And it's an incantation. And the more you practice that, I believe you start embodying it. You start [00:17:00] walking with it. You start experiencing yourself. I was telling my therapist the other day, I said, I no longer just see myself. I'm experiencing myself

Krista: Hmm. Wow.

Jess: whole nother level, you know, like you get excited to be in your skin.

You're like, Ooh, damn. Like, ooh. You know, like, you're just in it. I'm just loving me right now. I'm in a season of softness and appreciation.

Krista: Oh my gosh.

Andrea: beautiful.

Krista: feel like I'm vibrating. I'm just like,

Moonie: Do you need a minute? You need a minute? You need a minute?

Krista: No, it's so, so good. I don't need any minutes. I'm here. I'm so, I'm so willing to listen and learn and, and change, you know?

Jess: share our story because that's exactly what is, anyone can change any moment,

Moonie: any moment. It all takes a decision. Yeah, just

Jess: we had pain that led us to this purpose, but it doesn't have to be that way.

Krista: yeah. Yeah. [00:18:00] Um, I want, I wanna, yeah, go ahead.

Andrea: I just want to, um, acknowledge both of you for what you've just shared and to acknowledge the loss of your mom

Moonie: Hmm.

Andrea: and.

Moonie: you.

Jess: you.

Andrea: That, that experience and then the experience that you're in after having lost your mom? Um, I, my heart is actually racing.

Moonie: Take as much time as you need.

Jess: Yeah, they're always with us.

Andrea: It is not about it. It is about all of us, but I deeply appreciate what you've shared. My mom [00:19:00] was diagnosed with breast cancer

Jess: Hmm.

Andrea: in 2016. She's here today.

Moonie: Mm.

Andrea: I still have my mom.

Moonie: Yeah.

Andrea: And there's not a day that doesn't go by that I'm so incredibly grateful,

Moonie: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: but there's not a day that doesn't go by that I don't think about all of those who have lost anybody, a parent, a child, a loved one. And that day that she shared that she had breast cancer, I too needed to take a journey of, is this with her? Is this genetic,

Jess: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: which it wasn't fortunately, [00:20:00] the journey through a parent being diagnosed with anything or being given or being told that they have something that they're now living with, that they are either going to be able to navigate and continue on, or that it is going to be what ends their life. That journey changes all of those that are part of their worlds in so many ways.

And I hear that in what both of you are doing, and it's so incredibly beautiful. I, too was changed by my mom's experience and Half Betty is inspired by all of the loved ones, my friends, my mom, my two daughters, my family, all the people that we have on the show. [00:21:00] All of those that kindly listen because it's about making these conversations something that all of us get to be part of because the healing and the sense of not being in it alone and the sense of there is something that we can now put that grief and that heartache and heartbreak and darkness, that we can channel all of that into something and move it forward and make change. That is what this show is about. Um, that is what, not just what this show is about, but what this will become, which will be much larger and more profound in its impact than a show. It is about the community of people that are coming together and connecting, and so, for that I want to thank you both [00:22:00] as always, and thank Krista.

Um, and then put us back on a note of joy and, and, and positivity and what's, what's ahead of us. But I,

Jess: no, Andrea,

Andrea: really

Jess: time we're gonna cry. We gotta cry more this show

I

love cry. It's

Andrea: well, they'll, it'll probably

Jess: I love how open. You're too, by the way, that it means the world to us too, and I'm, I'm learning that as I'm going through my journey, is that. You are not alone. Like that's why it's so important to share your story.

You know, I didn't know that about your mom, but now that you told me that you have a sister in arms, like I feel a connection to you because we know what it's like when you hear those words. She has X, she has to do this, she has to go to that treatment, she has to you. You have been there, had a front row seat to what that's like. So that's all to say that as much as Moonie and I are about [00:23:00] joy, a lot of our brand is really about grief

Krista: Hmm.

Jess: there's not a day that goes by and we all are gonna have to face this. It's called loss.

Krista: Mm-hmm.

Andrea: Yeah.

Jess: great love comes great loss. And we as a society do not like to talk about these things. We do not like to look pain in the eye, but we are all going to face grief.

We are all gonna face death. We're gonna face loss. And we try to marry the two. Because the truth is, you can't have grief without love. You can't have joy with, you know, you need, you need

Krista: True, true. Hmm.

Jess: And, and we're hoping to harmonize the two and, and not stigmatize just going through that pain 'cause you're not alone. You're not alone. You're, we, we got you. You know the, the whole Moonie. The whole Moonie fam. Got you.

Andrea: Thank you. Thank you. and I think that is so [00:24:00] meaningful 'cause that ultimately is what I think people require to be able to put the next foot down in front of them, is knowing that they're not doing that in a void where they are the only one there. And the fact that we are agnostic of who we are, where we are, what color we are, what sexual orientation we are, what religion, all of that goes away in that. The connection that we all have is that we will experience a thousand joys and a thousand griefs

Jess: Yes,

Andrea: in a lifetime,

Jess: yes.

Andrea: and if we get rid of all the other stuff that's getting in the way and realize how deeply [00:25:00] compassionate and empathetic and kind that humans are at the core, and it gets lost. If we could get rid of everything else and come back to, that's what we're actually about.

We're about building and supporting others and seeing others thrive. There's no greater joy than seeing that something that you were able to do or something that you were able to advocate for or put together or organize or create a space for has another person or multiple people finding joy like that gives people the greatest level of happiness, and yet all we do, many of us, all we do is try and do the complete opposite. And so

Jess: That's what we say. The shortest distance between two people is a laugh.

Andrea: it's

Jess: that idea, it's that

Krista: So true.[00:26:00]

Jess: And that's, that's our sign off because

Krista: It's so good.

Jess: know that. And on top of that, we fundamentally know how death is the greatest teacher. Moonie I dunno if you wanna talk about that Michael Singer, quote, we about, you think life is about money or possessions, death.

Everything that we

Krista: Hmm.

Jess: that we are building ourselves about, like around, it's just, it's just illusions. It's

Krista: Mm-hmm.

Jess: It's about connection. It's about relationships. I mean, we are fundamentally aware that we are going to be. Success is quote unquote, right? And what, however you define that in that manmade world. But the prize is this the process. I get to work on my sister every morning. I get to talk to her every morning, relate to her, connect with her every morning. That's the prize. The other stuff is great. It's bonus. We're gonna do all the things, but it's the relationship.

Moonie: I can't wait for the other stuff. [00:27:00] Uh,

Krista: Oh,

Jess: where's the yacht? Where's the trips to Italy? Where's the Louis Vuitton

Moonie: we're the, we're the hospitals and factories that we're gonna build in Haiti. Right. And mommy's name, right? Yeah, yeah. Jobs that we're gonna create, lives we're gonna change. Yeah.

Andrea: I

Krista: me, tell me more about that. Wait, wait, wait. We wanna know what is your mom's name,

Moonie: our mom's name Jessie. Jessie,

Krista: Jessie

Jess: Jessie's girls.

Moonie: Jesse's

Krista: girls. Yeah. Tell me about your big plans.

Moonie: Oh, wow.

Our big, our big Why, um, is that, and it really came about after her death. We wanted, how can we let the world know about this wonderful human being that raised us the most? [00:28:00] Selfless loving. Um, just sacrificed so much as a single mother, a nurse, always giving, to her three children. this woman who, um, immigrated from Haiti at five years old and landed in Brooklyn, New York and just built this, had such a big vision, had such a big dream for her life and her children, and.

We wanted to honor that. We wanted to let the world know about who our mom was and is as a spirit and how she touched our lives. and so we wanted to give back to the, her home of Haiti, her community in Northern Haiti where she's from. And our goal is to, create a school called the Jessie Villard Leadership Academy.

Um, we're on the fence on whether or not it'll be centered towards girls alone or if, if it'll be, [00:29:00] um, coed. But we know the mission. We know we, we wanna build hospitals, we wanna build factories, to create jobs, in that part of the country and just give back. And, that's our big why.

Jess: Our mom, in a nutshell, I'd call her a broken record, you know? Um.

Krista: For the, for those younger kids that are listening,

Jess: Yeah, they're like,

Krista: what a broken record is?

Moonie: It's, it's like when wifi, wifi is buffering. When it's

Andrea: Wifi goes out.

Moonie: yeah,

Jess: and it just stays on that same track, you know, that you're playing on loop, you know, on your phone and you have that loop button. It's like that. So the benefit of that I wish I didn't see at the time is that I really know what my mom would say to me at any given moment because she was always in our ear.

She was always building us up. She was telling us about life. Um, at her funeral, the program, we had a list of what we call Jessie isms, which were just sayings that she would say all the time, seize the moment.

Krista: know. Oh, yes.[00:30:00]

Jess: They've got their agenda, you've got your agenda. there's nothing more to life than a good bottle of wine and good company things that our mom would say. Yes, you wanna be successful, be real. The same God that gave to Oprah can give to you.like this idea that she was constantly drilling in us, I mean, at the time I was like, Uhhuh, yeah, okay, mom, Uhhuh. But you're kind of passively listening and it is so deeply encoded in, in our DNA and these messages, these lessons, this needs a wider audience.

We need to take this back to the, to, to the homeland. You know? Um, as a journalist, when I was working at Time, I was living in Haiti and that was the first time that I lived a, in a black country. Um, b lived in a, uh, in Haiti. I was always like visiting, right? We'd go every Christmas and there was something so transformative for me being there because [00:31:00] I said to myself, I have.

Like this is home. This is a part of my journey. This is a part of my story. Um, and we were very blessed that we didn't grow up in a Haitian household where they like wanted us to only assimilate. So Moonie and I both speak Haitian, Creole and French. So when we go back, there's like this instant rapport.

It's an instant connection. So I feel like it's just this part of me, this huge part of me puzzle piece that gets connected as soon as we step foot. There and we know there's a reason that we were born Haitian, that we came and chose to be from this country that everyone knows as a fact, is the poorest country in the Western hemisphere.

But most of them don't know it's the first black republic in the world. we are freedom fighters. We had a constitution and, had free people, first Latin American country in the world. we were the first and we are punished for being the [00:32:00] first, but now the tables are gonna be turning and we are going to have the ability now to give and to break some of these cycles of poverty and things that we have seen over time.

That's our goal. that's where we're operating from our big why. that's it.

Krista: I love that you put in her name, but then also leadership.

Jess: Yes.

Krista: Tell me more about that 'cause you've already let us know about the leadership that she showed you with her words, with her actions. So tell me what that looks like in the schools and the buildings and the organizations that you're gonna build there.

What does that look like?

Moonie: The goal is for, these youngsters to be incredibly educated and we really are mirroring Oprah's school, that she built in Africa. the goal is for them to come back home to Haiti and give back to their own communities, um, and share all of the wisdom that they've [00:33:00] acquired, being educated at the most prestigious schools around the world, um, and, uh, lead their own communities in Haiti.

because, um, Jess and I aren't gonna live forever, so others are going to have to step up and take the baton and lead the next generation to come. So

Andrea: I love that.

Moonie: it was intentional for us to include that, in the title.

Krista: Mm-hmm. And there's a sense of ownership too, that whoever will stand in that space will feel that too, I think. Yeah.

Andrea: I really appreciate this sense of encouraging this return. What it's reminding me of is, something that I found incredibly moving as somebody who feels so moved by nature, always the story of Rewilding, the wolf [00:34:00] population back into, where they had been eradicated.

they took out all the wolves, because they were predators to farmers and to people who had livestock and the wolves were culled to the point where they were no longer in existence. And what happened over the course of the next number of years is that the environment changed the environment all shifted.

rivers changed courses, bird species left. other species didn't thrive. And years later, the wolves were reintroduced And the population started to grow. And sure enough,

Everything came back. The bird species that had gone away returned the rivers started to reverse their courses. Everything started to go back.

And this word [00:35:00] rewilding, has stuck with me for so long because it's such a beautiful way of capturing this essence of us all being part of that larger happening,no matter who we are, we are all integral to an ecosystem thriving or not thriving,

And so I love that you touched on this sense of returning bringing back a piece that was, lost from a special part of this world.

and it just reminds me that, are all important in what it is that we bring to the world. Even if we lose our path, there is still something in all of us that is important for how that system works or how it [00:36:00] doesn't work.

Um, so I picture these children all being where they should be and learning and being given all the opportunities to contribute to a beautiful community, a beautiful land. it feels very exciting to think about that happening because you've envisioned it and that's your dream, that's your goal.

That's your why.

Moonie: Well, I'm gonna thank you for sharing that. I'm gonna put a declaration out there that both of you ladies will be there when we cut the ribbon at the, uh, opening of the school. That Yeah. Yeah. It will be a full circle moment.

Jess: Haiti is known to be the NGO capital of the world, especially post earthquake, and I saw that firsthand.

And so yeah, Moonie and I are in the Richard Branson phase of things. Like we understand that we are not by any means the [00:37:00] experts and we wanna surround ourselves with people that are living and breathing this and get this on a core level.

Krista: Mm-hmm.

Jess: that's the objective because I think hubris is gonna be the fall. Um, and understanding that it really has to be inside out game and speaking to the people who are on the inside, the people who are in the community and building it from there.

Krista: But yes, ha, I, I was not expecting to talk about Haiti so much, but this is delightful.

Jess: And that's what we love, the flow of it. And mostly we start out with our words and then we move on to a catalyst, a transformation. But you've shared so much and I think there's so many transformations that you've already talked about,

Krista: I know that losing your mom that's a big change in your life and I'm so grateful that you are able to talk about that with such love and care.

and so appreciate that. and maybe we talk about that more or maybe there's something different too that you wanna add to that.

Jess: Moonie can jump in.[00:38:00]

Moonie: Um, as Jess said, death has been our greatest teacher, um, through our mom's. Physical death. She has breathed new life into us. Um, so after she passed, my journey was that I ended up abusing drugs and alcohol. I was almost 300 pounds. Um, I was in a very dark place. I, that was the first time I had experienced death before.

I mean, our maternal great-grandmother had passed. I was maybe 10 or 11. it didn't have any meaning to me. I didn't feel a sense of loss. Um, and those two or three years of just sitting in that pain and practicing avoidance and self-harm, by engaging in those activities.

It was the darkest time of my life. Um, and fortunately for me, I had a good friend of mine who had [00:39:00] completed a personal development workshop called Momentum Education. Shout out to Momentum. I was very resistant to, to participate in the program. Um, thankfully for me, she was like, it's free. I was like, sign me up, let's go when and where.

Uh, and there was one, exercise in particular that really was life altering for me in the most positive way. I was in the middle, of a circle surrounded by 50 people. And the exercise was, what do you want? And all of these fi 50 people are whispering, what do you want, what do you want? What do you want?

What do you want? And at the time, I thought I wanted to be an entertainment lawyer. I wanted to write the deals that the stars were signing. And, you know, that's what I thought I was supposed to do. And, I finally yelled out, I wanna be the number one TV talk show host in America. Um, and this is the time when [00:40:00] Ellen is booming, right?

And when you see someone doing something that you wanna do and you're like, that's where I want to go. And, from that moment I was like, okay, so you've made this declaration. How are you gonna make this happen? well, I love making people laugh, so let's start by being a standup comedian.

I entered an open mic. My luck. It was an open mic competition, so more pressure added and I end up winning the competition. And that's when it all started. I was like, you have something here, kid. keep at it, And I just kept jumping into the deep end and figuring it out and failing and bombing

But the difference between Moonie in first day on the job and now four years later, is that I have a different relationship with failing and bombing. I view them as. Learning as an asset, so I [00:41:00] I embrace failing and bombing more so than before, where I was very resistant to it and I felt, embarrassed and I felt shame, if I didn't perform well.

if the audience didn't, respond in the way that I intended to, that I wanted them to in the form of a laughter, right? And so, that moment of what do you want? What do you want? And verbalizing it just started it all. But it's interesting because the idea of my being the number one TV talk show host in America, the seed was planted when I was 20 years old.

I, I took time off from college because my sister and I, we overlapped and my mom was a single mom, so she couldn't afford to have both of us in school. So I took a year off and I worked at the local Friendlies. Um, and it was the best experience of my life because it, when I returned back to school, I was so hungry.

I had a voracious appetite for learning and doing [00:42:00] well in school. Um, but at the time I met this young lady named Lauren Knight, I'll never forget her name. And, I was making her laugh, and she's like, you're so funny. you're funny, like Ellen, you could have your own TV show like Ellen.

And that was when the seed was planted. But, being in a Haitian household, the three options were lawyer, doctor, or failure, right? So I was never good at the scientist, so I was like, humanities girl. okay, I am gonna become a lawyer.

and I kind of buried that dream of mine. and also our mom, she was like, you guys are black women. You've gotta get a license in this world. That's the only way this world is gonna respect you. so, we took that to heart and we took it seriously and we're all licensed professionals as a result.

because of that upbringing, because of that paradigm, um, that immigrant paradigm, I really just, put that dream to the side until that moment. [00:43:00] Yeah.

Krista: Can feel your mom just radiating through both of you. It's

Jess: that's the highest compliment. That is the highest compliment.

Moonie: Yeah.

Krista: such a gift.

Jess: I mean, you can imagine Moonie out there on the dance floor, she saw herself as bombing and failing. I saw her as having a fucking blast.

Krista: yeah.

Jess: I was like. Oh my God, look at her just being so free. Look at all the things that she's doing.

And at the time for me, I was journalist doing the negative things, feeling like I have to be serious. To be taken seriously. I really was indoctrinated in this idea, that's how you're supposed to act. And I was an anchor on top of that. So I was on camera and doing these things, you know?

and I was pregnant with my second, I had my son who was, four at the time, and COVID was happening. So it was like this [00:44:00] weird recipe of just a shit storm, to be honest with you. And I was feeling completely depressed in all of it. And. What resurrected me was this idea that we had been sitting on for four years.

It was after the birth of my son of a movie where essentially I, okay, back up a bit. I had my first child, unplanned home birth in my bathroom, my first child.

Krista: Okay.

Jess: Yeah. And it was a crazy, wild story. And you know how they're like, it never happens, like the movies, this happened like a movie. so when Moonie met my son, Emerson, she was gaga crazy about this kid.

And I was like, you love this? you love this kid so much, but if I couldn't have this kid, would you carry him for me? She took a long hard look at me and she was like. I would. And I was like, that would be funny, right? We were both like, [00:45:00] that would be funny.

A masculine presenting lesbian who gets pregnant and is her sister surrogate. So that was the concept for Butch Baby Mama. And we had this idea, germinating, germinating, germinating. And then finally with COVID happening, the world came to a halt. And it was one of those things where there was no more noise and it was all signal.

And I was in a funk. I was in a dark place. And working on that every day was the happiest I had been, That I could remember. And I was like, this doesn't feel like work. Yeah, it's hard. Yeah, I'm being stretched. All of the things. But it felt like working out, It's like you got that endorphin rush

So that's when we were like, this is it. This is us. We're like, let's submit it to Stage 32. Let's see where this goes. And then it ends up being a fricking finalist out of thousands and thousands of scripts. We had judges who had reached out to us after, and were like, [00:46:00] this was such a funny script keep going.trying to encourage us. I was like, we got something. we looked at ourselves and we're like, how many more examples do we need? Moonie's best friend passed away. She wasn't even how old

Moonie: 38.

Jess: 38 years old. Our mom passing away 61 years old. We're like, we think we have so much time. You don't have so much time. You don't know how much time you have. So the little time I have to dance while the music is still playing, I wanna get up and I wanna fucking dance. So that's how it all started and we're like, let's go.

And so we still had to pay bills. We still had to work. we still work actually. And we meet in the mornings. 'cause I have two kids that I'm raising. I can't do evenings. I'm exhausted. we wake up at five thirty, I have to wake up before my kids. We write for two hours.

I get them off to school and we start our work day. And that's the sacrifice. But again, it. Never been so [00:47:00] fulfilling. I've never worked on something so fulfilling. I feel so aligned in purpose and we all have it. And that's why when we're talking, 'cause I know there are other people listening to this, if there's a creative side of you, which we all have cultivated.

That's what you're meant to do, is to create on this earth, not to just consume. So yeah, that's how it all started.

Krista: Was that, when COVID hit and you were like, Hey, we're gonna write, I have this idea, let's work on it. Was that the beginning of your morning writing sessions and then You've been doing it ever since?

Jess: Ever since,

Krista: The dedication.because no one will sit there and say, I'm proud of you.

but I'm proud of you because the dedication that takes is. Is everything. That's how we move forward. That's how we create, that's how we share stories and learn and breathe and fall on our faces and pick ourselves back up again. And the fact [00:48:00] that you can do that together is so special because there's a lot of writers that are alone and they can only do it on their own.

And I, I have a writing partner and so I can relate to that piece of it and the joy that can come of the back and forth, and the creative juices and the dialogue that can happen and the wacky situations, especially with comedy, because, comedy's tricky. it's not always gonna register with people, but if you're true to yourself and you have a good thing going on, like you truly do, then you gotta go for it.

And how amazing was it to be recognized that your work is special and to be told, keep going. So,

Jess: it a little bit of wind. When you're rowing, it's a little bit of wind. Sometimes you get that little bit of wind to hit that sail. Most of the journey's gonna be rowing, and you gotta be okay with that. I think that's where people think like, oh, but nothing's working. It's like, yeah, 'cause you need to work.

You gotta work it out. But you'll [00:49:00] get a little bit of wind. That's the beauty of the universe. There's gonna be those moments that can push you but just keep at it. Keep at it. Show up for yourself. Show up for yourself. And I appreciate you saying you're proud of us and I'm proud of us too. 'cause we were doing this when no one was watching and there were no accolades and no awards to be received.

It was on pure belief in ourselves.

Krista: Yeah.

Moonie: and I think it's important, the drivers for us is, um, we work on our self-worth, our self-image. You have to believe in yourself. No one's going to believe what you have to offer the world unless you believe at first. You've gotta bet on yourself.

And that's what we do. we know that we're funny and we know that we're going to attract our tribe, our fans, our supporters, and that's what we're doing. We're attracting them. and like we always say, if we can do it, anyone can do it. We're self-taught. I've never written a script before.

I've never written a TV pilot before. [00:50:00] I never saw this person. I never saw myself doing any of this. Like I, to get on stage. people think that I'm so effortless and I make it look really easy. But I am literally freaking out in my mind right before I go on stage. I just recently came from, the Black Queer Creative Summit in Los Angeles, um, out of 202.

Oh

Krista: I saw that. Oh my gosh. Tell me more. It looks so amazing.

Moonie: through the GLAD Program, um, Glad Media is an organization that is, devoted to ensuring that people in the LGBTQ+ community are presented in a proud positive light, in the media space. And, I was so fortunate to be selected in this program and one of the wonderful events is that I was able to pitch, um, Moonie.

With the black queer version of Seinfeld to Lee Daniels and, a [00:51:00] representative of the Stars Network, like I am freaking out and people are like, oh my gosh, you seem so relaxed and You were captivating and you make it seem so easy. and they're like, how do you do it? And it's my mortality, knowing that I'm going to die one day is what gives me the courage to get on stage.

we have to use our mortality to push us, to be bold, to be outrageous, to take risks, to bet on ourselves. because on our deathbeds, we're gonna have regrets. That's part of this thing we call life. The goal is to limit the regrets. So knowing that I'm gonna die one day is what gives me the courage to get on stage and.

I haven't found a betterimpetus, you know, a better driver.

Krista: and Jess, uh, can you talk about some of your successes too, about the program that you did with Tyler Perry recently? Is that completed or what happens now?

Jess: It is completed. It was a dream collective. So Tyler Perry launched the first, dream [00:52:00] Collective. his studio launched it, I should say. Essentially, a thousand people applied. A hundred were selected. These are all directors and emerging directors, and you had to submit a short film script, which was then, accepted and with the end, prize being that you would be granted $30,000 to produce the short film on Tyler Perry's studio lot.

So super cool. I got selected in the, first round, Were part of a weekly sort of masterclass for six weeks, and we essentially got to experience, Directors and writers and editors, all these people who are in the industry, just be a hundred percent candid and open with us about their experiences.

We had Patty Jenkins, the woman who wrote Monster and directed Wonder Woman, John August, who wrote Big Fish. people who have, not only just done things in their career, they've [00:53:00] maintained a level of, integrity and they have really strong voices. So it was, it was all very cool.

I did not get selected to be the 10 that ended up going to Atlanta. However, I did start an alum network, so now there is a group of us, a network of people, 'cause these are people who've all been vetted and clearly are capable and smart and talented and hardworking, all the things.

So we are looking to support one another as we start to develop our short films. Although we didn't get the $30,000 grant from the Dream Collective that we can help each other see our films actualized and that's what we're looking to do.

Krista: It's so smart and that leadership that you're threading through both of your lives right now is a perfect example thank you very much for this experience. I'm gonna hold onto all these really great people. We're gonna learn from each other, we're gonna continue this. And the fact that you started that, you took that leadership to be like, wait a second, this is so valuable.

we can learn [00:54:00] from each other. Let's grow and change together and lean on each other.

Jess: Oh,I was an arrogant 20-year-old. I really thought that the way I was gonna move up in the world was to the people who were on top, that they would like me enough and they would give me a boost. I should have been looking to my left and to my right and making lateral moves. 'cause that's how it works.

You rise

Krista: we learn it through time. And experience, and, all

Jess: And we feel like those people are competition. It's complete bs. it's the opposite Those are where you should be

Krista: yeah.

Jess: like creating bonds and relationships. 'cause people like to work with people who they like,

Krista: Oh my gosh. Absolutely. Yeah. you just totally nailed it, that I only wanna work with like-minded individuals. I want people around me that care and are honest and communicate well, that are passionate and creative, and that I can learn from. I, I never wanna stop learning.

Jess: I love it. I love it.

Krista: Um, okay. So I wanna know where you are now, what's moving forward for you? What are you excited about? We heard about the [00:55:00] school in Haiti and all your plans for that.

And yes, we wanna be there when you cut the ribbon and cheers to that. Um, but what else is going on for the two of you Can we help elevate and lift you up and shine the light? what can we do?

Moonie: Yeah, so right now we are just looking for investors and people who. We don't have to convince or explain what we're doing, our brand and our projects. it's either you get it or you don't. the moment we, have to explain it. I don't think it's gonna be a good working relationship. and people who believe in us who see the vision, um.

We have a lot. We have,Butch Baby Mama, we have Double Down, which is a TV pilot. We have Moonie, the web series, the Black Queen version of Seinfeld. We're working on a Christmas feature film right now where we envision Kevin Hart and Will Ferrell, playing the leads. right now, for the first time, Jess is helping me with my, 30 minute [00:56:00] comedy special, so we're going to produce that.

Um, so it's the first time we're collaborating with on that. And so far it's been very successful. Um, yeah, we just have a lot going on and, a lot of projects and we're even. working on taking more risks and betting on ourselves even more than we are already. and so maybe in six months from now, we could have another chat um, get an update on where we are, because we're doing big things.

We're doing big things.

Jess: I would just simply add to what Moonie was saying about finding the right people that connect with us. I think it's a matter of us not feeling that we have to persuade anyone, and that goes to this idea that we are gonna attract the people that we are meant to. Work with, you know, we're gonna attract our tribe.

And I think whenever you feel that you have to tap dance and you have to perform, um, I told my therapist, you know, [00:57:00] the only person I ever felt like whose opinion really, really mattered was my mom. And the freedom, and actually her passing is that there's no more audience. the audience is of one.

And that's really me. And making sure that I'm okay with what we're producing, that it's in alignment with who I am. that's the place that we're operating from is making sure that we are leading with authenticity. we are not coming from a scarcity mindset. There is so much out there, there's so much abundance out there, and we're just gonna tap into that.

Krista: all the projects, all the love that you're pouring into, everything you do, the confidence, the care in which you're moving, the confidence in knowing that if this project or this script or whatever the project is, will align with somebody else than it's meant to be.

the companies will come, the branding will come, the sponsorship will come, the financing will come. I truly believe that when someone believes in a project and connects with the story, [00:58:00] they connect with the people behind it,

I'm sohonored to know you and that we can have you on the show. But this is in the end 'cause I know Andrea wants to have a little chat about something that's on her mind.

So go ahead.

Andrea: Something that both of you talked about earlier, which I really appreciated and loved, was this, sense of play. you talked about how play in its natural state, when you just allow yourself to play, which all of us want to, but as we get older, that gets taken away by, what is, acceptable, what we're supposed to do, how we're supposed to show up, who we're supposed to be and that landed so deeply because, I too believe that that's part of what drives me forward orfind where I'm meant to be is where I am in childlike wonder. With whatever it is that I'm in.

And it has [00:59:00] been joyful to watch your faces your body language your smiles and your eyes light up as you describe what you're doing. Because it literally tells me that you are feeling that connection to your mom and to all that helps you continue making those choices and being in those places where you literally are like joyful children.

A very wise and wonderful person who became a mentor for me. He once said the reason that a lot of people as they get older, feel as though time moves so quickly. And we feel like time speeds up and we don't know why that is. This phenomenon. He had read or had done some research around [01:00:00] children feel like the summer holidays when you get outta school, thatyou cannot believe how many days you have of the summer ahead of you. And what, why does this happen?

And it was because children are experiencing things for the first time. They haven't had that experience before. They haven't seen that thing before. They haven't done that thing before.

And in first times, time slows down because you are taking in with all your senses And so time feels like it slows down. But then as we get older, we don't have firsts because we don't have anything that we're really truly with all of our senses experiencing for the first time.

And I thought, oh my I wanna make sure there's first times until I'm no longer here, because then maybe time will slow down a little bit and.

Jess: because we're the first double interview, right? [01:01:00] Is this the first

Andrea: Yes.

Krista: right.

Jess: you're doing it?

Andrea: It's about firsts. So thank you for being the first double interview 'cause you filled up my firsts for today

Krista: also knowing that in our midlife, I know we're all reinventing ourselves and we can all allow,

For firsts and new journeys. And new paths, right? that's the most exciting part about being in my midlife,And I feel so grateful to find others like you two, where we can, grow and change and learn together and share these stories and also for our incredible, community of listeners who have shown their love and kindness for us and also very much for our guests.

I wanted to ask you though, so my dad passed when I was 22. I was really young. and a couple nights after he passed away, my mom and I were laying on her bed and we were looking up and we saw this heart on the ceiling. And, Prior to that, my dad had, replaced the diamond ring on my [01:02:00] mom's wedding ring to a, heart shaped diamond.

And that was kind of like a moment where we thought, oh yeah, he's here. And whenever I see hearts and all my friends know, in fact my friend just made me a necklace, she put a little heart on it and everyone knows That's kind of my thing. And not that you, you need to share it,

But I'm really curious to know if there's a number, an image, something that pops up in your life when you know she's there and when you know that you're in the right place.

Moonie: Oh my God, there's so many things

Krista: Are there?!

Moonie: I'll share the ones that, make me think of her. Um. Jessie's girl.

Krista: Yeah. Good. Yeah,

Moonie: um, hearing that

Andrea: Rick Springfield.

Krista: yeah,

Moonie: Yeah. other songs that were her favorites. Uh, Butterflies and Rabbits. like when she passed. April 8th and there's so many rabbits around.

So whenever I see a rabbit and, red cardinals, whenever a Cardinal is here, A loved one is [01:03:00] near, the number 54, the year that she was born,

Andrea: Tom Jones.

Jess: there were times that she would listen to music that I didn't even know she liked. she liked the Eagles and Neil Diamond and I'm discovering my mom is a person and her, stories about being a little girl and a teenager.

all of that stuff was coming to the forefront 'cause she wanted to be around things that brought her comfort. Yeah, for me, I remember Moonie, you'd always say that to me, Jess, just pay attention. Just pay attention. Um, and there was a moment, days after she had passed and we were looking for where to have the repass, and I'd gotten lost, the GPS had taken me all over and I was just like, I don't know where I am.

And I stopped the car. And then I looked up and there was a street sign, it said Villard Street, which is my mom's maiden last name, which is not a common last name at all. And it was one of those things like, like pay attention. she's around, they're there, I don't know what is beyond, but I know there's a connective tissue and I know more importantly, she lives in my body, my [01:04:00] cells she's in me.

So, um, I think It's what you choose to focus on, signal versus noise. And for me, that's always been the signal. wherever those instances come up in my day,

Krista: Thank you for sharing.

Jess: For sure,

Krista: Yeah,

Andrea: Signal versus noise.

Is there anything else you wanna share before we say Until next time,

Moonie: Um,

Andrea: six months,

Moonie: just

Jess: know,

Krista: right. For an update.

Moonie: we just wanna

Andrea: it down, just

Moonie: your, okay. We just wanna, um, encourage your listeners that we aren't doing anything like special or extraordinary. What we're doing is, is tapping into our inner special and everyone has an inner special, We wanna remind them that they can pivot at [01:05:00] any age.

It doesn't matter how much money, time, you've in invested in what you're doing right now, if you are not fulfilled, if you are not happy, I decided that I wanted to become a lawyer at 20 years old. I'm. 43 years old, why am I going to keep living a life based upon an idea that came to my mind at at 20 years old?

we're constantly evolving. That's the goal, right? So as we are evolving, so are our desires, our wants. And so I just wanna encourage, if we can reach one person today to you can be like, you know what? I'm going to sign up for that 1 0 1 class, or I'm gonna go sign up for that open mic.

Or I'm gonna just take the first step. Just take the first step. And you know, as Dr. King says, as you take that first step, the rest of the staircase will be revealed. And just keep choosing you, keep betting on you, and keep believing in you [01:06:00] and this dream of yours. And keep feeding it. Yeah.

Jess: I don't have anything else to add. I think that, yeah, mic drop moment.

Krista: it's really beautiful. Moonie. Thank you so, so much.

Andrea: It's very real.

Krista: I do believe that we were, meant to meet. I believe that deep down in my heart. I'm so grateful, to have met you. I'm grateful for our time together. I'm grateful for what the future looks like and, um, just really encouraging you and supporting you to keep on this journey and this path of doing wonderful, beautiful things together and making people laugh because we all need to laugh right now more than ever.

Jess: Uh, thank you both and

Moonie: you both.

Jess: vulnerability, openness. I think the world just needs more of this for connection. Um, so from the other side of the border, uh, on the American side, we please send it our way. We need all of that

Moonie: Oh, yes, we do. Yeah.

Krista: Hmm.

Andrea: You got

Jess: [01:07:00] Right.

Krista: you come visit us anytime. We are here for you.

Moonie: with a side of maple syrup? Love with a side of maple

Krista: Yes. Yes.

All right, so we need to let our listeners know where they can keep track of you. Um, do you wanna share your socials

Jess: my IG is, @directjess and we also have our website, phasesofMoonie.com

Moonie: And we also have our podcast, @agoodlaugh podcast we come out with, an episode monthly, and my ig handle is @moonie___, M as in Mary, OON as in Nancy, IE with nine underscores. Nine underscores. Can you believe that?

Krista: Alright, we're gonna put all this in our show notes and link to all the good, things that you're doing, including your amazing, hilarious podcast that is so necessary in this world. So please, everyone listening, go out and listen to a bunch of episodes.

They're all so, so good. and of course for us Half Betty on Instagram and both, Andrea and I are on LinkedIn. You can [01:08:00] follow us there.

Andrea: Thank you for joining us today friends, and you can come back and listen to All of our episodes are available anywhere you get your podcast and now on YouTube, so you can follow us there We feel your love, so keep reaching out and keep that community close to you and we will hear from you soon.

Krista: Thanks friends.

Moonie: Thanks guys.