S2 EP 8 Danielle Mika Nagel

[00:00:00]

Danielle: Every posture should have a balance of effort and ease. It's not just on the mat, right? It's our life. So every relationship should have a balance of effort and ease. Any job, a balance of effort and ease and balance, not being this 50 50 scale, and it's just this ebb and flow of making sure that those qualities exist wherever in your life, in all the areas that are important to you.

Andrea: It's funny what stays. Not always the big obvious moments, but the ones that you almost overlook at the time, and then later you realize that they have stayed. In every episode, we always invite our guests to share five words, words that hold something true about who they are or where they might be right now.

And as you listen today, you may even notice yourself quietly asking the same question. The first time I met Danielle Mika Nagel, I was in one of her yoga classes, and even before it [00:01:00] began, there was something in the room or something in her that felt steady, open, and quietly grounding. At the end of the class, she made her way around to each of us offering a simple gesture of thanks, and I remember feeling something shift just slightly, but enough.

This conversation feels like a return to that moment and an opening into something we're holding a little more intentionally this month. As we move through May and into Mental Health Awareness Month, this episode is the first of two conversations that we're sharing, both rooted in the ways that we care for our minds, our bodies, and the quieter parts of ourselves that are so often asking for attention, a reflection on midlife, on leadership, and on the practices that bring us back to ourselves and to each other.

This is Half Betty and this is Danielle.

~I just, ~Just when you were [00:02:00] encouraging and, ~um, you know,~ supporting~ honestly, and, and, and ~in that lovely way that you do and seeing people's strengths, ~it was reminding me, it was a floodgate of reminding me of the first yoga. I literally can picture where we were. Um,~ and I ~just remember just the ease.~

~'cause I was at that point fairly new to yoga. It wasn't a practice that I had been doing for very long because I was, um, new to Lululemon at the time. And I~ remember going into the class with a bit of, ~you know,~ nerves around, ~you know, how was I gonna be able to do this and~ was I gonna be able to do this?

And, ~um, ~who would be watching how ridiculous I might look ~and~ which is something that I've let go ~now~ of, I don't care ~actually ~how ridiculous I look anymore, which is awesome. Um, but I remember. You being the instructor. And when you walked in, it was almost like there was ~like a,~ a breeze from outside, even though we were in a studio, there was ~almost like~ this ~like~ breeze that kind of entered into the room when you came in ~and it was warm in there.~ And I was just like, oh, what, what has just happened? It's like this energy came in and things ruffled, or my hair felt like it had like a little breeze ruffle it.

And I thought, gosh, ~this,~ this already feels lovely and [00:03:00] already feels safe and like a place~ I can, ~I can do this. And then your class was beautiful and moving ~and,~ and I was able to do as you instructed, and at the end in Shavasana, you walked around and you stopped by each person's mat. ~And I just remember kind of like, like a, like a child waiting to hear from a teacher or something, you know, where you're waiting for your turn.~

And I remember ~kind of ~hearing your feet as you ~kind of~ moved across the floor of the studio to each person's mat. And then ~you kind of~ said something or ~you kind of~ gave a gentle, ~um, you know,~ encouraging word or something. And I ~just~ remember thinking, oh my gosh, she's gonna come by my mat soon. And I just remember how encouraged and hopeful I was that I could do this.

~Um,~ So very similar to what you've ~just done,~ done with. ~With, you know, this,~ this podcast that we're recording now, your encouragement and your support and your,~ um, your, your ~breeze that you bring in this like, kind of ~like this ~wonderful energy, which is what I think of you. I think of energy and ~I really,~ it just ~is like, kind of~ brought that all back.

So thank you [00:04:00] for being here and thank you for being one of my first yoga experiences. 'cause I think it's what made me fall in love with yoga and with the practice. I don't think if it was somebody else, it might have been exactly the same introduction.

Danielle: That is so sweet, Andrea. Thank you for that beautiful memory. And I think that's gonna be one of my five words is I am the breeze in the goddamn room.

Andrea: You are the breeze. You are the breeze.

Danielle: Oh my gosh. But no, for real though. The two of you are so legit. I love your podcast. It's vulnerable, emotional, and I'm just loving the topics too. And you have ads. I'm like, how legit are the two of you? You are taking it to another level.

Krista: It's a lot of fun and we've learned a lot along the way now in [00:05:00] season two. And, ~you know, the,~ the guests that we've had along the way have been so helpful and encouraging and open and vulnerable, like you said, and that's, that's made us just wanna keep going ~and, ~and remain curious too. So, yeah. But that breeze.

Oh, the breeze. That's so beautiful.

Danielle: I've never been described that way. You're so good with words, Andrea. I am. I am going to put that in. I'm gonna put that somewhere. I'm the breeze. I'm gonna tell Scott, at least my husband. Hey, you know what? I'm the breeze. Yeah.

Krista: There you go.

Andrea: ~You are the breeze.~ You know, ~it really, it that,~ that breeze, even though it's kind of quiet and it's unassuming and it ~doesn't need,~ doesn't need fanfare, and it doesn't need ~even like people to take, you know,~ to stop or pause. It just ~kind of~ enters and for some reason it changes the entire experience of whatever people are ~kind of~ doing because ~it,~ it adds this moment or this beat [00:06:00] where it refreshes ~and it, ~and it gives you some kind of energy that you didn't have before.

And I think that is ~such a. It's~ such a gift. Um, if we can embody that into our lives with others and with rooms that we enter, if there's like this gift that we can have, it's just adding that subtle, not massive, look at me, look at me moment. But we can offer, ~um, ~encouragement and, ~you know, a, a a,~ a pause or ~um, a,~ a cool down, maybe. Certainly people, women in midlife would really appreciate a breeze at many moments in their, in their midlife journeys. Um, so yeah,~ I think, I think, uh,~ a breeze is a very special gift ~that you,~ that you bring.

Danielle: ~Thank you.~

Andrea: ~We have been so looking forward to having you since we spoke. Probably it was probably a year ago. It might have almost exactly a year ago. And, um, we, I remember I was, I went into the parking lot down in Kitts Beach and I was sitting in my car to take the call and I remember Krista and I chatting before that and I said, oh, Krista, this is, we're gonna talk to Danielle.~

~It's gonna be amazing. Gosh, I wonder if she would consider, you know, being with us on half Betty because to hear her story and to just like all of our guests, it's just gonna be so full of things that people will. Absolutely resonate with. Um, and you know, there's, there's this kind of, um, Krista and I have been really fortunate in that many of the folks that we're having on the show say for a few are people that either were kind of part of Krista's or are part of Krista's life, or peripherally in Krista's life or mine.~

~And then the other person gets to have like their first introduction to this person. And it's this kind of, it's kind of a gift because we get to experience meeting the person for the first time through our. Partner through, through either Krista or myself, we get to have this kind of experience of meeting people for the first time.~

~Um, and so in these episodes, um, you know what, what is really fun is to watch the, the person perhaps in this case, Krista, um, have the opportunity to, to really hear, you know, a lot about your story from the, for the first time. And, and then I get to kind of witness that and that's a real, that's a real treat.~

~So, um, I just wonder if you, Krista would love to, um, kind of open this up and, and kind of introduce and or kind of introduce your first kind of query with, um, with Danielle and, and kick us off.~

Krista: ~Thank you. Well, I am actually,~ I wanted to dig in a little bit on how the two of you met. 'cause I always think that that's an interesting thing to hear about, and we don't have to go into it in detail, but I think it would be [00:07:00] cool to set up that scene as to how the two of you know each other, and then maybe it'll naturally ~kind of~ move into some words that ~we could share or that~ you could share Danielle with us. ~Yeah.~

Danielle: Sure. Well, we met at Lululemon and that is a bit of a non-traditional story too, in the way that I started working at Lululemon. So I was a yoga teacher, I was managing the Chopra yoga studio in Vancouver, and I was also an ambassador for Lululemon. So I'd been an ambassador for a few years. That's like a community leader who comes and supports and does events for Lululemon.

And at the same time, it was ~a,~ a beautiful partnership too, because Lululemon would come and support these individual community leaders as well. So I remember, ~um,~ it was actually, ~I think~ in Andrea's department, uh, the leader there, Duke Stump and Eric [00:08:00] Peterson were like, Hey, we, um, we wanna bring you in. We have this vision to be more mindful within our organizations, actually in our 10 year goals.

And, um, one of the pillars was called mindful performance. And so they said, we don't know exactly what you would do, but are you open to come in and create a role for yourself? And so I said yes, because I was looking at all the people there. They were already my friends. It was this, ~um, just ~exciting time, especially at Lululemon.

And ~I~ perhaps you feel the same way too, Andrea where Yeah, we would just create fun stuff together. And so I came in, I had no job description. ~This is at my interview, like, I'm gonna use air quotes for interview. 'cause it really wasn't much of an interview.~ But, um, I had said, ~oh yeah,~ I've created my own, uh, job description and I'm calling myself the mindfulness manager ~and,~ and these are some of the things that I could do.

They're like, okay, great. So I started to come in and um, was hired by the brand [00:09:00] team. And I remember Eric Peterson had sat down with me, he was the head of community at the time, and he said, look, we're not gonna tell you what to do. You just watch us and tell us what we need. And so that's how my work just started to evolve.

And one of the first things that I ended up doing was bringing a basic meditation program to our onboarding so every new employee would learn how to meditate. And I felt like it was this powerful tool and a gift that we could offer every single employee to be able to regulate their nervous system, to recognize that they are not their thoughts, to recognize that they have agency in the choices that they make in their lives.

And so ~that's how, ~that was like the first thing that I ended up doing at Lululemon. And then I was introduced to Andrea and she was doing creative work there in the brand team. And so I remember we created a movie together. I mean, we had a lot [00:10:00] of fun. ~That's my, my side.~

Krista: What was it like for you, ~Andrea? You're um, you're muted. What was it like for you, ~Andrea?

Andrea: Mm-hmm. Um, I, I love that story. It's always important, which is really ~kind of~ at the center of what we're all doing, ~um,~ in our work now is, ~um,~ offering the space for people to share their stories because each story comes with the unique lens of the individual and each story told by somebody is such a gift to hear when you were part of that story for them, because you hear it through a different perspective.

And ~I,~ so much of what you just described is,~ again,~ maybe not things that I was~ thinking about or~ remembering, but now that you've shared it, I think, ~oh gosh, yes, that's right. Or ~Wow, yes, I remember that moment. ~Or I remember those times like the films and um. I think one of the things that you said that has been a really strong carry forward, and there are many from the time spent with Lululemon in those early years of the, of the organization, really at the, kind of the, the, the beginning of the way that the organization was really starting to develop and build.~

~Um,~ you mentioned, um, community a couple of times and that has been such an important and really critical piece of everything that I've carried [00:11:00] forward, ~um,~ from that time. ~And, you know, there the, ~The company was working from a place of building community, ~uh. Um,~ one piece at a time, ~and almost in these, if you imagine like, um, little circles, that's how it, that's how I picture it in my mind is that these, these small little circles that would be kind of, um, organically grown within different communities, um, going into, um, a neighborhood or going into an organization and from those little circles that grow kind of organically into these like larger communities, all of a sudden you've got circles connecting with circles and you've got this kind of like organic, beautiful kind of, um, amalgamation of all of these communities which have grown.~

~From, you know, ~from ~kind of~ a center core practice ~of,~ of some people that share some similar values and similar, ~um,~ goals and shared practices like the meditations that,~ that ~Danielle ran, um, and the yoga. And so for me, um, that time was ~really highlighted, or it was, it was~ an emphasized time of looking for how we could continue to build these communities that we were building through conversation, through, ~um,~ the different ways ~that,~ that we could show up, whether that be in person or through film or ~through, um, ~imagery or through meditation practices, through events.

So that whole time was really grounded in, um, [00:12:00] bringing this community experience to as many people ~as,~ as we could ~in a, in a beautiful, inclusive, um, safe.~ Just like those yoga spaces and ~those ~meditation spaces that Danielle led, safe, kind, ~encouraging, um,~ spaces that that was really how we were building out the organization.

And so to, to learn from people like Danielle and to participate in the work that the organization was doing at that time ~was,~ was really transformative.~ Um,~ and it's carried through and it's still what we're doing and what I'm really practicing today, which is, ~um, I. ~Creating the spaces for people to connect and for people to feel safe, encouraged, included, ~um,~ and surrounded by people who are hoping for, ~and,~ and holding them capable of great things.

And Half Betty ~is,~ is really born of that same desire to create spaces like that. So, um, thank you for sharing, ~sharing our,~ our story, [00:13:00] like our collective

Danielle: Our Origin story.

Andrea: our origin story. Yeah.

Krista: Well, it sounds like both of you have really pulled through a lot of what you learned there, ~and I'm sure there was probably some things to being, you know, even in a corporate environment that maybe didn't, you didn't wanna. Continue on with, and you probably let those things go, but what,~ what are some of the practices or some of ~the,~ the positive things, Danielle, that you've taken out of that experience?

I mean, what a gift to~ just~ be able to ~be given an opportunity to~ make up a title, make up a job ~at all,~ all within something that your mind, body, and soul is just~ like~ oozing to start and to continue. Like what, what were some of the things that ~you've, um,~ you've brought with you through the years and maybe even into ~now in~ your practice now and the way you're ~mo you're~ moving around in this world.

Danielle: Yes, ~there's.~ There's an element of trusting the universe. I know that sounds so cliche, the trust in the universe, but, or, or maybe we can even call it, like listening to that subtle whisper that's guiding you, and it's almost as if you're being called or pulled in those directions. [00:14:00] And so the opportunity with Lululemon, I had never thought, I wanna work at Lululemon. I wanna work for a multi-billion dollar organization. No, the intentions that I had set for myself were, I wanna work with my friends, I wanna work with people who challenge me, who help me grow. I wanna be in a space of, as Andrea said, shared values. With the people I'm spending time with. And so that's how I'm, I'm not somebody who's like, let's set these goals. Which is so funny because as soon as I went to lululemon I was like, okay, day one, you're setting goals. 1, 3, 5 year vision, whatever it was, 10 year visions. And I'm like, I don't like to create that much specificity. It's more of a feeling, a subtle intention that I wanna set and I wanna be open to how things unfold.

And so it was a reminder of just being in that space of openness, clearing myself so that I'd be able to hear those subtle [00:15:00] intentions and then allowing that to guide me. 'cause Lululemon was such an incredibly fun, transformative, ~um,~ beautiful experiences of my life. It was a great chapter. And here we are because of Lululemon.

I'm so grateful that I'm on this podcast with the two of you. Right. We have so many connections that have continued ~beyond,~ beyond our work there.

Andrea: I love that you just used that, ~that. Um,~ reference to chapter, I've been finding myself using that a fair bit, ~and I ~What does that mean to you? Tell me more about chapters or ~how, how you,~ how you use that in your own experience or~ of, of your, you know,~ in reflection of your life.

Danielle: I've never been asked that question, and I love this question so much. I feel like it's like reading a book, right? So if we're using the metaphor of chapter and reading, I'm not attached or holding on to [00:16:00] that chapter. ~Right. If you're reading a great romance, I am so into these romance. I don't know what it is, but maybe it's part of my midlife stuff where I'm like, let me just read all these fantasy.~

~I'm like, Scott, can you be more like this guy? He is totally a Oh, yeah. Oh yeah. Let's get, let's go there. Callen Hoover.~

Krista: ~about all of them.~

Danielle: ~Oh, okay. I'll,~

Krista: ~and everything. Okay. I'm gonna, we'll talk sidebar after.~

Danielle: ~well, if you ever interview readers, I'll put, I'll raise my hand for that. But anyway, it's like you're~

Krista: ~we're gonna talk later.~

Danielle: you're not attached to that chapter. You're like, okay, what is coming next? Even though that chapter may have been really juicy or maybe it was really challenging, you're ready to turn the page. And so that's how I am seeing, you know, my time at Lululemon was a chapter of my life, a chapter of my life of raising our daughters.

That's a chapter. Now we're on the next chapter of what does it look like to have two adult children? So it's about not being fully attached to how things work. 'cause everything as we know, is constantly evolving and I feel that if I'm completely attached to something the way it is, that is just going to cause much more suffering as I turn that page to the next one.

Andrea: That's beautiful. ~Do you find with that,~ I love the description of being able to release or look forward to the next chapter as opposed to feeling sad that it's over or ~sad or~ mourning the fact that it's over. I think that's really [00:17:00] very important for us as we become more aware of the chapters, um, to be excited about the next as opposed to, um, longing for the last.

But do you find that there's anything that you're pulling through all your chapters that is a bit of your red thread as we say?

Danielle: Ooh. Well, I think all of that lived experience that each of us goes through that unique lived experience is that red thread from, you know, probably one of my first chapters when I was living by myself in Germany. I dated this man and it turned out to be an abusive relationship. When I think about the learning from that, even though it was probably the most challenging time in my life, and to be so young and faced with something like that too, where I had to start making decisions for myself.[00:18:00]

And that experience ~though,~ has brought a sense of boundaries for me where I'm like, oh no, I'm not doing that. And maybe there, it's a little bit of rigidity too, where I'm like, no, no. I'm not going camping. No, I don't think so. I'm not even going skiing. I don't like that. Uh, no. I am not gonna sit in the back of a motorcycle with you.

Hell no. No. This is what I like to do. You know, but I think that has carried where I was so like, you know, malleable in my youth and, and maybe it is a little bit of rigidity, but also the experience of like, no, this is who I am. I'm comfortable in this, even though I do wanna stretch myself too. So it's a little bit of a dance, a nuanced dance.

Andrea: ~So would you say then, I,~ I hear that you are ~pulling, um, no, I don't wanna use the word lessons, but it sounds like you're~ pulling,~ um,~ deeper knowledge of you all the way through, and each chapter you're learning more about yourself, and then you're [00:19:00] applying what you learn about yourself to the next chapter.

~Does that~

Danielle: I love that.

Andrea: Oh yeah. Okay. How wonderful. ~So it's, it's almost as though as this Danielle book unfolds each chapter, um, there's, um, a unique chapter that has an experience that offers you a deeper knowledge of Danielle. And then the next chapter, you apply that knowledge to the experience that you have that, again, is unique, but each one you're becoming more and more Danielle and more and more centered to who you are through all these chapters. I mean, that's, it sounds So where,~

Danielle: that I'm evolving.

Andrea: ~where do you feel like what chapter you are you in now? ~Tell us about the chapter that you're in now.

Danielle: ~well, I'm really digging this metaphor of the book. When you two, when we were speaking about this podcast and you were talking about midlife, I was like, am I at midlife? Because part of me feels like I am past midlife at 51. Like, oh, I'll be really excited if I do live to be 102 in a healthy way and cognitively functioning well.~

~Um, but yeah, sometimes, and maybe this is a story that I have like, oh, I think I'm kind of past the midlife of my, um, my full book here, and I totally forgot the question. Andrea, what's the question?~

Andrea: ~that's okay. I'm just cur that's that we should circle back 'cause that's really interesting. And you, you, we definitely wanna hear more if you would like to share on that point. But what chapter do you feel if, in your book, 'cause you're writing it, what chapter are you in right now at 51?~

Danielle: I feel like I am at the peak. Right now I am entering the peak

Andrea: That's exciting. I just got goosebumps.

I just

Danielle: the reasons why. Oh, okay. So have you two ever had a Vedic reading, like having your Vedic chart read?

Krista: No, but I want to tell me about that.

Danielle: So I'm in this course right now to just develop, you know, one of my five words. Um, when you told me oh, five words, I was like, oh my gosh, five words. This is lots of ~press~ pressure here, but what was, um, learning? I continuously want to be a student. So I'm enrolled in this course with, ~um,~ a friend of mine, Dr. Suhas has who I met through Deepak. And, ~um, it's about being able to read. Well, you know, there's a lot of things, but ~a component of it is being able [00:20:00] to read somebody's individual chart and it's kind of like your destiny. So it's a little bit like if you were to see an astrologist, but this is a Vedic astrologist.

And I can't share~ like~ what the difference is between western astrology and ~yogic or uh, ~vedic astrology. ~You'll have to like Google that because it is, to me it is just way too complicated. I don't understand the exact differences,~ but your signs are different. ~Like your rising sign is different. It's something about the moon and the sun and the planets obviously 'cause it's astrology, but I can't explain it.~

But ~anyway,~ when I had my Vedic chart most recently read to me at the end of last year with Dr. Suhas, 'cause I was, uh, doing Panchakarma, which is a five day Ayurvedic detox where you ~have venos and you~ eat cleanly and you get massaged every day. And there's this whole thing about detoxing and he was like, okay, you have just entered this 20 year period where you are at the peak.

Like you are just starting the peak of your career.

Andrea: Wow.

Danielle: And I was like, what? Because part of me felt like, okay, the last 10 years I was in that ~space, in the~ corporate space, ~you know,~ leading teams, doing all this, being so busy, but also really tired, really, really [00:21:00] fatigued from that too. And I just~ kind of ~thought, okay, maybe this is about ~like~ just being, ~you know,~ with myself in nature, not working too much.

And he was like, oh, no, no. This is the ~start of your, the~ peak of your career. And like a good coach, ~you know, they, ~they ask you ~like, ~how is that resonating with you? And it was absolutely resonating with me and making me feel excited about this chapter. So that's where I feel that I am in the chapter where it's like, this is it.

This is the next 19, 20 years where it's all about lifting up.

Krista: Well, and that makes sense. ~I mean, ~and I think so many people in their midlife feel that way. They come to that realization probably differently. Everyone does, but. I'm so happy to hear that you were leaning in when you heard that and~ you know, and~ not scared or not ~like, know,~ feeling the pressure to do well or to do better, ~or,~ or feeling that [00:22:00] exhaustion that ~some,~ some people can feel at this age, right?

~Like,~

Danielle: Mm-hmm.

Krista: there's a lot of people that just wanna cruise. ~Right. But~

Danielle: Oh, I still like doing that. I love cruising.

Krista: But I think you have the, I don't know, the word balance always ~kind of ~pops in and out of these conversations. It tends to, but I don't know if you wanna, ~you know,~ contribute to that conversation or not. But it is an interesting perspective that we have being in ~our.~ This chapter ~or this midlife~ or second scene ~or whatever, you know, people register with. But~ I think it's really cool that you wanna lean into that and explore it ~and,~ and still find those moments to chill and to, you know, just cruise.

Danielle: Absolutely. You know, Krista, when you were talking about that with balance, there's a sutra in Patanjali's Yoga Sutra, so this is probably the most recognized book on yoga. The yoga sutras are potentially where there's 196 sutras. It's like threads, 196 threads of wisdom. [00:23:00] And ~you're,~ you read these and then sometimes you can interpret them in a different way that's applicable to you wherever you are in your life right now.

And one of ~'em, one of~ the sutras is yoga. Sthira Sukham Asanam

Which means every posture should have a balance of effort and ease. And the way in which I interpret that is, well first of all, it's not just on the mat, right? It's our life. So every relationship should have a balance of effort and ease. Any job, a balance of effort and ease and balance, not being this 50 50 scale, but sometimes it's ~90,~ 90% effort, but then there's 10% ease or vice versa.

And it's just this ebb and flow of making sure that those qualities of effort and ease exist wherever in your life, in all the areas that are important to you.

Krista: That's really beautiful. Wait, do you know all, [00:24:00] how many are there? A hundred. And

Danielle: 196. No, no, I definitely don't know all those.

Krista: You must have favorites.

Danielle: yes, that's one of my favorites.

Krista: Good.

Danielle: I'm like, this job is becoming too much effort. I'm not having as much fun or ease in it. Right. And then I can make a choice.

Krista: Yeah. And that's a good way to ~kind of check,~ check in, right? I think what's also coming to the surface for me is ~this,~ this feeling of knowing who you are. So then you're able to give to others or to share your wisdom with others or your love with others. ~Right? ~And I, I would hope for most people in their midlife ~that,~ that that's a thing, but if it's not, do you have any suggestions or ~any,~ any offerings for people that are still trying to find themselves in their midlife and, and trying [00:25:00] to, ~you know,~ sink into that place that you are feeling?

Danielle: ~Ooh.~ Well, I think we're, well, I am, I'll speak for myself. I am constantly trying to remember who I am, right? So there is that chapter that we're talking about of ~attachment, ~attachment, being able to move to the next chapter. There's a practice of detachment with that. And so, ~you know,~ especially when people are working for other people and you have the fancy title, you have the financial security, you have the status, the seat at the table, all of that.

It's enticing to get attached to that. ~But then you know when you need to,~ but that's not who you are, right? That is ~a,~ a small component of who you are. The chapter is not the entire book. It is just one piece. And so you know whether we're 51, 61, 70, whatever, or 20, and you just recognize like, okay, that's not [00:26:00] whatever you're associating yourself with right now. Whatever you're identifying yourself with heavily, whether it's your gender, your sexuality, your race, your job, the roles that you play as mother or father, whatever it is, or child, those are just pieces of who you are. And so not to get so tied up in that, and I know that is like so much easier said than done, but whenever I get my panties in a wad over something, you know, which happens pretty frequently.

I hate to admit that, but it's like, okay, hold up. Where is this attachment coming from? Because it's not coming from my soul. My soul is not attached. My soul is able to flow effortlessly and recognize that the individual soul is present in all beings, right? So I'm able to see that. But if I'm constricted in my ego, [00:27:00] then I'm gonna be operating from that place of fear, of judgment, of comparison of less than, of all the things.

Not to say that there are not good qualities of the ego too, but you know, it's a good check to be like, okay, who am I asking myself? Who am I? Am I the director mindful ~for ~performance or leadership development at Lululemon? Maybe for right now, but not later, and obviously not at this current moment, but noticing, asking yourself that question, who am I?

That deep soul question and just start to pay attention to what are the answers that are coming up. Are you heavily identifying yourself with all of the jobs or roles that you play each day?

Andrea: What a beautiful way to create that view of I [00:28:00] am, fill in the blank. You are, and then fill in the blank of all these different roles that~ are, you know, that we, that~ we fulfill throughout our lives. Um, to create that perspective or that space to be able to see that we are not the title that we are given. ~We are not,~ we are not only, we are for a time. I loved how you mentioned that for a time. Yes, you are the director of whatever it is at this organization or you are a mom to young children. Yes you are for a time. But that those moments like chapters ~also~ have often, ~most often~ a beginning and an end and an emergence into the next space that you are fulfilling.

Um, ~I feel, or I wonder because you have mentioned you have two daughters. Um, and or you mentioned that you had, that you had daughters and I, I, I know that you do have two, two daughters and you also talked about them being now adult daughters. Um, and talking about, you know, chapters beginning and ending and shifting.~

I wonder if your experience,~ um,~ with your [00:29:00] daughters or perhaps there's some other things that have ~kind of ~concluded or ~kind of ~become not the same as they were for a very long period of time in the last number of years that you feel have been a bit of ~like~ a catalyst of taking notice of who you are.

~So I don't know whether it's your daughters, um, becoming adults or whether there's something else, but I wonder if there's something that's coming to mind for you that has kind of arisen in the last number of years.~

Danielle: I love that my daughters are now adults. I mean, when they were little babies and completely dependent on me, that is so much responsibility for anyone to have. It's like, oh my goodness, I have to take care of this other human life. And that was also happening at the same time where I was caring for my mother who was struggling with her cancer and caring for her.

So I really felt this pressure of ~like~ caring for my mother, caring for my daughters, and having a full-time job and trying to, you know, work my way up and, and do a good job there too, there was a lot of constriction at that [00:30:00] point. Now it's like, it's amazing having adult children. I mean, our daughter, so our 21-year-old, she lives with us.

She just graduated from Toronto Metropolitan University and so she's come back and, and lives at home with us and she cooks, she cleans, she makes cocktails. Like, I'm like, this is the life. Like moms hang in. There you are in the roughest, like those, those moms who have young children,~ and I know your kids are younger than mine and Andrea, but ~those are some rough times.

Even when you have to be the, the chauffeur and take them to all their practices and running around like, now I get to spend all this time thinking about me. What do I wanna do? ~Maybe it's like the narcissist chapter. I don't know, but it's like, oh me time, this is amazing.~ You know? 'cause they, they are self-sufficient now.

~Well, I mean, you know, the, but like we still pay bills, but besides that part,~

Speaker: ~still that.~

Danielle: ~I'm not putting them to bed. Right.~

Speaker: ~What an~

Krista: there like a moment when you realized you were like, wait a minute, wait a minute.~ I don't have to do anything for them anymore.~ I don't have to be a certain way. I don't have to~ like ~hold [00:31:00] a place like I am. I'm gonna go on a trip. Or ~like,~ was there a moment for you where you ~like it, you~ realized that things are different?

Or was it just a gradual kind of entry?

Danielle: Well, I mean, there's a little bit of that gradualness, you know, of course from~ like, you know,~ when they're first born and all the different chapters that you go through, ~you know, ~as a parent. But I think the, the big, like, oh my gosh, like my life is my own again, was when Scott and I moved back to California.

So when we, we were like, okay, we're gonna stay in Vancouver until our girls graduate from high school. And then I really wanted to be in the sunshine. I grew up in LA so I was like, okay, I want to come back to Southern California. LA's a little too hectic, but San Diego is like my ideal vibe. So we came here and I was like, this is amazing.

We just made this choice. I felt like the last 15 years we're like, okay, we have to make [00:32:00] choices based on what's good for our girls and who knows what's good for our girls. Maybe pulling them out of school and having them move around would've been just as fine too. ~You know, there's no like book on. Well, I mean, there probably are books on parenting about this with strong opinions either way, ~but~ I mean,~ I think you have to just make your own choice as a parent for what's, what you think at the time is best for your family.

And so our, our position was we have a good thing here in Vancouver. Let's keep them here. And so once they left. Yeah, it was like, oh my gosh. Like, let's take our bras off. whoooo

Krista: I love it

Andrea: so encouraging. That's so encouraging.

Um, and I think, ~um, I think, I think~ we are ~probably.~ Maybe ~we are kind of~ in that same window. 'cause ~um,~ my girls are actually ~now Sophie's the eldest, and both of them are~ home from university for an extended Easter weekend. So I've got a house full of children again, which is really lovely.

Not children, adults, but Sophie, my eldest is 23, and then Bridget turns 20 in, ~um,~ another month. So I'm kind of in that same [00:33:00] space, um, where I'm straddling, I don't know if that's the right word.~ I'm,~ I can feel the ease away from the, ~the, ~the deeper feeling of like, ~who am, to your point,~ who am I now when ~I'm not?~

~All the time, and Krista is in this space.~ I'm not on the clock, round the clock for the ~the live or the~ wellness. ~The wellness~ and the care of children and who am I now and how do I fill that time now that I'm getting it back. And for a period, ~you know,~ probably a, at least a good beat, I was ~like, I'm~ scared to move into this space of not having all my time dedicated to something that I know because now I have time and I don't know what to do with it. And as much as it was as

Krista: That's when you go make a podcast Andrea,

Andrea: That's when you go make

Krista: a

podcast.

Danielle: Exactly.

Andrea: and you get an agent and you start like film school and you like do all kinds of weird and wonderful [00:34:00] things, but it's terrifying.

Danielle: fun?

Krista: No big deal.

Andrea: but you know, we can manifest. Um, it is fun, but it's also, it's like I would call it, uh, I have to like hybrid two words together.

Like it's both terrifying for me. It has been rather terrifying to let go of what I know so well and have felt that I've been able to do well. Lots of ~like~ mistakes and lots of glitches, but by and large I just felt like I was learning and I was able to do something with my full dedication. So to let go of that and then go into a space where I don't know what I'm doing, have no idea how I'm gonna show up, may be terrible, which really doesn't feel good.

Um, and, and really, I don't really know how to put like a title to [00:35:00] it, so it's not just a mom, but it's now you're kind of out there, you're not really a thing. I, I was like, this is terrifying and so exciting all at the same time. So it was like having two, two little puppets, one on either shoulder.

Terrifying. Terrifying. Scary, scary. Run, run, go hide in your bed. And then, oh my gosh, there's so much to look forward to. This is so exciting.

Danielle: Oh yeah. I mean, you can read a romance novel at the beach.

Andrea: I haven't done it yet, so

Danielle: in your thong that I dare you, Andrea, go topless in your thong and put a romance. Yeah, get a romance novel

Andrea: I might not need live in Vancouver though, Danielle, because I may need to make the move to the hotter weather because I don't know if a Vancouver thong romance novel has the same vibe as a San Diego warm thong romance novel

Krista: Okay. That's fair.

Danielle: Uh, I just [00:36:00] wanna put the ~dis~ disclaimer out there that I am not wearing a thong in public, but maybe I will.

Krista: Maybe you will

Danielle: Who knows

Krista: because you can if you want to.

Andrea: because you can. Danielle, you said a couple, well, you, you maybe like kindly added in another extra bonus word of, of breeze, but you did share one of your words. Um, and I'd love to come back to that. So you shared that one of your words is learning.

Danielle: being a student, yes.

Andrea: And we've heard you touch on all of the learning that you're constantly doing and have done through your life 'cause ~you've,~ you've said so beautifully how you've taken learnings from each chapter whether they've been difficult or beautiful. ~You've taken learnings ~and you've applied them to the next chapter. Can you tell us, ~um, if you'd like~ a little bit more about learning, but also maybe some of your other words that you fell in love with or felt comfortable sharing?[00:37:00]

Danielle: Ooh. Sure. And I love that you two do this with your podcast. 'cause I feel like it's such a wonderful entry into that guest who ~you're, who~ you are connecting with. So in terms of the learning, yeah. I feel like ~we've, ~we've~ kind of~ covered that, but there was one story that comes to mind with this. Uh, word of learning and being a student, and it was when I was co-facilitating the 200 hour yoga teacher training for the Chopra Center.

We were in La Costa and there were almost a hundred students enrolled, and I was teaching that morning and everybody was just getting set up. Then in walks, Eddie Stern. So Eddie Stern is, I would say ~kind of like a, um, I don't love using this term, but~ for lack of a better word right now, a master yoga teacher, like a very seasoned, been a yoga teacher and educator for decades, ~um,~ was somebody who [00:38:00] was,~ um, and maybe not a pioneer, but somebody ~dedicated to the lineage of Ashtanga yoga too.

So incredibly strong from a physical standpoint practice. And also I'm sure he could recite all 196 suturas, Krista. so as it is, like he, he was this master kind of guru. Coming in, and I think I was on the mic and I said, oh shit. Eddie Stern is coming to my yoga class. ~And he was doing some work with Deepak.~

And so he was there and he just ~like ped, he~ put his palms together, acknowledging me bowed. And uh, there was a moment where I thought, okay, should I deviate from my plan for the teacher training and for these students right now, because Eddie Stern has just walked in and unrolled his mat to practice.

And this is somebody who, as I mentioned, could do a lot. So I thought, okay, should I, you know, make it a little bit more challenging? And I was like, no. What am I, this class is not for Eddie Stern. This class is [00:39:00] for the people here enrolled in the training. And this is a gentle style of yoga. So I was like, Eddie can do whatever the hell he wants.

I'm just gonna teach to this group here who I'm here to serve. But as I watched Eddie, he did every single move I shared, lower your knee down, take child's pose, you know, come to a seat forward fold, let's rest. Like every cue he listened. This teacher who had so many more decades of experience than I did listened to me and with humility and respect, and I just was like, this was such ~a,~ an incredible moment for me to recognize that being a quote unquote master teacher, a seasoned teacher is first about being a listener and a student, and always be in that space of learning and growth.[00:40:00]

So ~that's, um, you know,~ that was the story that I wanted to share in terms of learning ~and,~ and continuing that too. But another one is flexibility. I would ~describe,~ describe myself as flexible, and that's partly because I am a yoga teacher, so my hamstrings are somewhat flexible.

Krista: Physical and mental.

Danielle: I'm still working on the,~ the, the~ mental piece of flexibility. But, um, I didn't take this like conventional route and you know, I know the two of you haven't either, but when I was 19, I was a student at Cal State University Northridge. When I auditioned for the musical production of Cats in Hamburg, it was my mom who said, Hey, there's, I know Krista, you and I have this musical theater background.

Krista: I auditioned for it too. I was like, I wasn't [00:41:00] even done high school. And I auditioned. I think I was 16 when I auditioned. And obviously they didn't take me because I was too young. They, they did ask though. Oh my gosh. Keep going. You auditioned for Cats. Okay,

Danielle: you did at 16. That is incredible. Oh my gosh. So anyway, I got the role and I auditioned when I was 18. I had just turned 19 and I moved to Hamburg, Germany, and I was like, okay, yeah. So I'll be here for a year. I'll come back to school Six years later I'm like, you know, going and doing other shows as well, moving to Berlin.

So I was in Hamburg, then Stuttgart, then Berlin. I even married one of the performers too, just for three weeks, but that's probably another story. But, you know, flexibility. I was like, Hey, this is not working out. It's time to exit, dude.

Krista: Here we go.

Danielle: So, ~so that.~ Then I'm 25 coming back, living with my mom, working as a [00:42:00] waitress again at the same Italian restaurant that I worked at in high school and part of college.

And then I meet Scott, ~my,~ my husband now, actually I met him in Germany, but we started hanging out, I moved to Hawaii to be with him and I became a Hawaiian wedding singer. Um, ~that, you know, ~after that we're like, okay, what do we wanna do with our lives? ~We moved to Canada 'cause we were like, oh my gosh, you know what's going on with the states?~

We wanna make sure that our kids have choices and options. So we moved to Canada. That's when I started, ~you know,~ really teaching a lot of yoga where. I met Andrea and then like the whole entry into Lululemon and the corporate space too. Just being flexible and not being like, no, this is what I do. This is who I am, this is what I say yes to, and this is what I say no to.

But just again, kind of moving with where I'm being called. I mean, even the way in which I taught my very first yoga class, I would say was flexibility [00:43:00] because the studio manager, this was back in Spokane, Washington, had called and said, Hey, can you teach yoga tonight? I was teaching Mat Pilates. For this athletic gym.

And I said, ~and~ I can't teach yoga. No, no, no. You know, I just, it's just Mat Pilates and she's like, well, we're we're really in a bind. ~You know,~ the teacher who normally teaches has called in sick. Could you teach tonight? I really think that you'd be a great teacher. You always come to class and, um, I think this could be something really wonderful for you too.

And I said, no, no, no. I can't teach, but I recognize you're in a bind. So if you call everybody else on the staff and if they can't do it, then I'll do it. And then she says, I've already called every single person. You're the last person I'm calling. So I was like, well, I told her I'd do this. So I said yes, had no idea what I was gonna do.

Hoped that nobody would show up. And one student showed up named Liberty, and it was her [00:44:00] very first yoga class. And I said, this is my very first time teaching yoga. And I gave her a class that was a hot mess, you know, mixing up right and left, jump here, do this. All the cues were all over the place, but I did care about this woman.

And ~next,~ the week after that, same teacher called in sick again, and I was like, oh no, here I go. I'm teaching yoga again two times now. And then Liberty came, she came back with two friends. And so that's how I started teaching yoga too. Just being like open to whatever comes,

Andrea: She came back for the breeze.

Danielle: The breeze might have been a little clunky back then. I don't know.

Andrea: ~I,~ I don't know, Danielle, I think the breeze is what carries~ I. ~The learning, the flexibility, [00:45:00] and the other things that you feel that you kind of guide or are guided by in your life. I think that's what the breeze carries ~because what like that, that energy out is what people are feeling and that's what you are kind of.~

~Embodying. So it's in, so it's energy that's inside is now kind of being shared through that breeze.~ I mean, whatever that looks like, that's how I'm picturing it as you're describing this. 'cause there's something that obviously through all the clunkiness, Liberty was like, that was the best class because there was no pressure.

Uh, she was so human. ~She made a couple of things that were mistakes in the, you know, in the instruction. And she probably, knowing you, you probably did your lovely laugh and said, oh well that was not the right thing for me to say.~ And she probably felt so welcomed ~and good~ and supported in that because ~that's,~ that's the feeling that I had in that exact class that I described at the very beginning.

~All those years later when you were instructing, when you were still, probably not still, when you were probably really on with every cue, you still carried that feeling of, Hey, like I, I mess things up sometimes and I'm not perfect, and I might, you know, make a mistake here or there and you're good.~

~You just do whatever you can on your mat.~ And so it must be why Liberty showed up again. So flexability,

Krista: And brought friends.

Andrea: and brought friends.

Danielle: Practical preference.

Krista: so cool.

Danielle: I mean, everything~ you've,~ you've been describing about me, Andrea, is you, you know, you could describe yourself in that same way. And you too, Krista, [00:46:00] I know I'm getting to know you right now too, but you two create this safe space for women to share their stories and hold space through that vulnerability as well.

And you know, I feel like we are all simply mirrors, right? I'm mirroring back your energy that you're giving me and vice versa.

Krista: Mm.

Andrea: ~What a lovely way to~ thank you. That received, that's beautiful. Um, tell us, 'cause I'm now excited. It's like unwrapping gifts. Tell us another word on your list.

Danielle: Okay. Well it's two words. Can I

Andrea: Two words. Okay. Yeah, you, you're not limited.

Danielle: Okay, good.

Andrea: I feel like there's a rebel in you anyway. So even if I said there was one, I feel like you would take two.

Krista: Do. Do you have a nickname? Because Andrea calls her Baby Rebel.

Danielle: Baby Revel. I love it.

Krista: do you have a nickname for your rebel side?

Danielle: Oh my gosh. Well this is so funny. What a great intro to that, [00:47:00] Andrea. It's like You are, we're aligned because my words are bossy guru,

Krista: Yes.

Danielle: and it's not a title, it's not a nickname, Krista, that I gave myself, but it was during the yoga teacher trainings at Lululemon where the group just started calling me Bossy Guru. Uh, yeah, it was like, oh, okay, guru there. I had a bit of an aversion to that just for a hot second because I was like, okay, I don't wanna be the sage on stage, but actually I kind of do wanna be the sage on stage.

So, you know, it's this little dance here. ~But~

Speaker 4: ~I love ~

Danielle: ~guru piece, the thing that I am in, uh, the, the, ~the part of it that I'm embracing and is like being able to hold the structure of a container of transformation for groups. And so whether that's in yoga teacher training or a yoga class, or a corporate event, or it with my coaching clients too, it is being able to hold that [00:48:00] container.

And sometimes you do need to be a little bit of a bossy guru, you know, and lean into like, Hey, it's past 10 o'clock time to shut it down bedtime now. Or like, you know what? You're taking up too much space right now. Do you see there's 25 other people here on this retreat? Right? Like holding that container in a kind way, but just creating those boundaries so that everyone can have that experience of transformation that they need.

Andrea: Oh, now ~I'm, now~ I'm excited about just, I just wrote it down. It looks so good on paper. Bossy Guru. looks

Danielle: Bossy guru. Yes.

Andrea: feel like that's like a t-shirt. ~I don't know why, like,~ I feel like ~that is,~ that is very ownable. I love it. And ~hold,~ hold the container is a new phrase.~ I've never,~ [00:49:00] I haven't heard that before.

And I feel like that really, um, that creates such a amazing visual as well for, for me. Um, we talk about holding space and I think that's beautiful in and of itself, but there's something about container or being contained ~that doesn't feel that,~ that feels~ actually really, um, ~considered. I, I think that's what it is. It's like~ if,~ if you're contained, ~all, ~everything has been thoughtfully ~and is really under that person's. Full view,~ and ~it is being~ deeply cared for in that space. ~Like, I, I just, there's something about container that really like resonated when you said that. Um, because, you know, anything that's not contained potentially is like, some parts of it are kind of, you know, oozing out into other areas or maybe not part of like a, a whole, so I feel like container somehow creates this wholeness.~

~So I, I, I wrote that down. I really enjoyed that a lot. And, and having a bossy guru and a container like those two combined, like, sign me up, sign me~

Danielle: Well, I feel like when I lead my retreats, I lead two retreats a year, and they're a week long and they're, you know, groups of people who come in. They are ~like~ parents, they are executives, they are people who are just starting into their career. I have a wide range of people coming in and it is about~ like~ holding that container for an entire week of a group [00:50:00] and making sure that Yeah,~ you know,~ there's not drinking and partying that's starting to go on.

Right. There's,

Krista: Totally.

Danielle: right. It's like,

Krista: The container has the lid on it and everything's okay.

Danielle: Exactly.

Andrea: That's a ~perfect,~ perfect description. ~And sorry, I also had one of my children just sneak in as, as you were saying that because she just got her, just got a job that she's been waiting to hear if she got, and so she was just so excited and she was like. Are you wanna call mama? And then I was like, yes, yes.~

~I wanna call. Just maybe skirt around the edge. And then she's like, I got the job.~

Danielle: ~Oh my~

Speaker: ~wanted to say that's what just happened. So I Yes, thank you. She's so excited. Sorry. So that, and, and she's, she's working in this amazing ice cream, the, the, the biggest ice cream shop in, in Victoria, where she goes to university and it's like the hottest job to get.~

~And there were dozens and dozens and dozens of applicants. And she, she got it.~

Danielle: ~Oh my gosh. That is incredible.~

Speaker: ~so fun. We're talking ice cream first job, not first jobs, but like big jobs, big summer jobs and containers. It's all coming together. coming together. Just as you said, Danielle, like it's like you just kind of roll with things as they unfold.~

We've got bossy guru learning flexibility. Do you have some more words ~because we don't want to not hear~

Krista: ~mm-hmm.~

Speaker: ~what you've been thinking about? I,~

Danielle: Well, there's a word that I was like, okay, do I wanna put this out there? ~And I was like, okay, fine.~ And I thought, well, maybe. 'cause I know with some of your other, ~um,~ guests ~you've had, they~ haven't shared, ~not all of them have shared~ five. So I was like, okay, maybe that'll happen with me too, but since it's not, I'm gonna just lean into,

Krista: Okay. I love this.

Danielle: so this is more flexible flexibility. 'Cause I was kind of like, okay, I'm tapped at three, but, um, it's bougie.

Krista: ~Oh, I just listened to your last podcast,~

Danielle: ~Oh, you~

Krista: ~your April 1st podcast.~

Speaker: ~Oh my gosh. I have not~

Krista: ~I didn't get all the way through it though. I am like, I'm almost done it, but bougie. Yes.~

Danielle: ~I'm~

Speaker: ~Say more.~

Danielle: ~secret, well, maybe not secret anymore, but~ I think the bougie, the reason why I was like, oh, don't wanna put it there or not, it's like, you know, ego, ego, spirit, ego, spirit [00:51:00] of obviously, yeah. Like Bougieness is, is derived from my ego wanting, ~you know,~ more of these luxuries. But at the same time, I feel like it's an act of self care ~and like a deserving, you know, it's like I freaking deserve this.~

~Right. And yeah, I feel like it's self care,~ it's self love. I grew up with, ~from~ my mom, who was a first generation Japanese woman, and ~you know,~ she was born in 1935. She experienced ~like~ poverty. ~And so,~ and I think for a lot of our parents ~and,~ and their generation, right? They were not going to all these restaurants and posting about their incredible meals and ~having like, you know, they,~ they weren't doing things like what our kids are doing now.

And so we're

Krista: I think a little bit bougie compared to that generation, let's be honest.

Speaker 4: ~Totally~

Danielle: right? I mean, my, my youngest Gabby, who's 19, she knew what a bidet was when she was three years old. She's like, how come this hotel doesn't have a bidet? ~I'm like, oh, okay.~ What's the thread count on these sheets? [00:52:00] Yeah. ~How come this hotel doesn't look like that hotel?~

~We just came from? Right.~ So there's a bit of like wanting to lean into some of those ~bougie ~luxuries that I consider luxurious as like a form of loving, ~loving ~who I am, you know, ~love ~loving being at this age and with the, ~uh, ~means that I have as well, ~you know, and just being like, yeah, if I wanna have an incredible blowout, just because yes, let's go for it.~

Andrea: ~I, ~This is so refreshing in so many ways ~because I think that there's,~ I'll speak for myself. I really wrestle with,~ um,~ how much I should love certain luxuries and privileges and love them out loud versus being like, oh, ~I shouldn't,~ I shouldn't love that, because~ like,~ that's gonna be perceived as being like very indulgent and, ~you know,~ privileged and, ~you know, ~taking it for granted.

And I, I really appreciate how you. Articulated that it's not without recognition [00:53:00] of how wonderful it is and what an amazing experience it is to be able to have such, ~you know, um, you know, ~luxurious experiences ~or,~ or things or whatever it is. And connecting that to self-care and connecting that to loving yourself and connecting that to, um, recognizing that it's not come without a lot of incredibly hard work and a lot of dedication to, ~um, you know, ~making that part of your life.

~Um, and also in juxtaposition to those that didn't maybe have that opportunity and, you know, recognizing that. It, it would've been nice if they also could have had that opportunity, and why would you not really enjoy it if that's something that you've been able to find? Like I, I love that it gives permission to love wonderful experiences,~

Krista: ~like that,~ that kind of bougie attitude ~or feeling or products or experiences can,~ is, are so different for everyone. And like I said, I'm sure compared to other older generations, we are all living a very bougie life. ~Like~ I think a lot of us are, ~um, in that,~ in that sense of, ~you know, ~the opportunities that we have.

Right. Um, when I was listening to your episode, you were talking about, ~you were talking about the,~ the garbage bags. Could you ~talk,~ just share that for a minute.

Danielle: my gosh,

Krista: and~ that, that's also,~ [00:54:00] that's also a little like an upgrade, which we like, to me anyways, you go and talk about it because I just thought that that was like really interesting the way you wish you described it.

Yeah.

Danielle: That's so funny. Krista, thank you for reminding me about the garbage bags. I mean, that is so right, like how un bougie is that? The garbage bags. When Janelle and I were talking and she was starting to talk about her bougie thing being ~the~ her electric toothbrush, I was like, oh, this is going downhill.

People are gonna tune out now. But then she picked it up when she started talking about ~like~ the concierge, the host, like the 24 7 concierge in The Bahamas. But anyway, with the garbage, again, it's like, you know, raised from my mom, there was no way we were going to buy garbage bags. Like we we're not gonna buy trash bags.

You get those at Ralph's, you get those. When you go to the supermarket, you get plastic bags. That's your trash bag, right? Or even Tupperware containers. [00:55:00] You clean out those old margin containers and~ that's what you serve.~ That's what you put your leftover food and not actual Tupperware. Right. So yeah, we, we kind of went through this whole like cultural thing too of Yeah.

Being in the middle of what, like you said, Krista, our parents I'm sure would all think we are living. Just like I feel

Krista: Oh yeah.

Danielle: my daughters. I'm like, what? Well, first of all, you know, pay your own bills before you start getting too bougie.

Krista: Let's, yeah, let's get priorities straight here. Yeah. Willing to help you find the job, however, and prepare you to get the job, but,

Danielle: totally. ~But yeah, they were going to like, you know, at 14 going to Cactus Club as like their regular place with their friends and I'm like, Hey, hey, hold up.~

~What? You know, like, no, you're not gonna Cactus Club at 14 years old as like your regular, you know, just like, oh, this is my casual place that I go to on a weekly basis. Go to Chipotle.~

Krista: ~Yeah,~

Danielle: ~Exactly.~

Krista: ~yeah, yeah.~

Speaker 2: ~Um~

Krista: So we haven't talked about your podcast and that's what we're referencing right now is the episode, I think it's April 1st. This episode got released about all the bougie things that you and ~your,~ your co-host talk about. Could you talk briefly about ~your,~ your podcast ~and that,~ because that's also something, now, correct me if I'm wrong, that ~you started last year.~

You started last year with your friend. ~Can you,~ can you tell a little bit more about that? 'cause I also think that that's kind of [00:56:00] a cool thing that you're doing in later in life. And much like Andrea and I, you know, it came from an idea and then that just, it had a domino effect. And here we are in season two, so Yeah.

I'm so curious to hear a little bit more about that ~before we, uh, kind of slow things down and, and start to wrap things up here.~

Danielle: I love that. Well, ~it was two friends, so Janelle and I met~ Janelle Aaker my co-host for Coffee Unlimited with j and d. We met at Lululemon. So again, you know, so much gratitude and appreciation there. But she was the first Head of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion there at Lululemon. And she had left, Lulu went over to Van City, which was a financial organization ~at YouTube.~

~You probably both know that, being based in Canada.~ And I went over and worked with her because she was such a progressive leader. Like I just need to be around women who are lifting other women up to,

Krista: My gosh, amen.

Danielle: Finding opportunities for people, like constantly thinking about others, and that's who Janelle is.

It's like, okay, who needs to be in this room? She was, ~you know, ~bringing that inclusive lens when [00:57:00] I first met her, ~when she was challenging things like, um, I'm like missing, I'm missing the words right now, but the background checks, right? Just like going through budget lines and be like, how can we keep, like, let's just get rid of these, these, um, you know, background checks, these consistent background checks.~

~You know, it's, we're, we're perpetuating this story that the justice system is just right.~ And, ~um, so anyway,~ I just was like, she's one of those people who I will follow.~ Like~ if she goes to an organization and she's like, Hey, I want you to come in here and lead this department. I'm like, yes, I am gonna work with you.

So when she and I both left ~that, um,~ our last job at Van City, we wanted to stay connected with one another. And it was like, okay, well ~let's, ~why don't we, ~why don't we~ just start a podcast? Who knows what we'll talk about? ~You know, maybe, maybe it'll range like all these different~

Speaker 4: ~Yeah.~

Danielle: ~and,~ but it'll keep our friendship going. So it started off like that. I mean, it really is that too. We don't have any ads. We're not as plugged in and dialed as the two of you are. Like you two are definitely professional with your

Andrea: think you are, I think you're,

Danielle: producing and sound.

Speaker: ~It's amazing. I, I've so enjoyed, especially the fact that your podcast to me feels like you're, you're, you know, the title of it, which is that you're getting to join you and Janelle having a coffee. Like, it's like we met you at like a little coffee shop somewhere,~

Krista: ~so~

Speaker: ~and cute, and we're like joining in on some great conversation.~

~It feels, again, very inclusive, which obviously is such a big part of what you both live. So I think your podcast is fantastic and both of you definitely invite people in to join the conversation and have a laugh and giggle~

Krista: it's really authentic.

Speaker: ~saying. Yeah. Yeah. It's awesome.~

Danielle: a good word to use for our podcast, Krista. ~Yeah, it's like, I mean, I'm the editor, which means like I just in iMovie, like cut the. The beginning and the end, and then I put a little jingle,~

Krista: ~That's great.~

Danielle: ~ends and I'm like, duh. Here it's,~

Speaker: ~That's brilliant. I mean, that's really what we're doing.~

Krista: yeah, and just ~like~ think about all the people out there that are,~ you know,~ wanting to start something and knowing that they can, like, yeah, we're in [00:58:00] season two and we've learned a lot and ~we've alternated. You know, some things we've, ~we've changed ~over ~over the time, but we haven't changed a lot.

We are still at the core, ~you know,~ talking with women ~and,~ and asking them if they're comfortable to share their stories, providing a safe space ~for, for,~ for that to happen. And, ~uh, I mean it's,~ I just think ~the, the,~ at the core of it all, it's something new. It's something that the two of you talked about, you both decided you were gonna launch into it and it was gonna be what it was gonna be.

And I think that's such a great way to be living our lives no matter how old we are. You know, you talk about learning and you talk about always wanting to learn and grow, and that's ~really, um, that's~ my jam too. ~Like, that's,~ I just wanna keep challenging myself and knowing that I can keep. ~I can keep at it and I can keep~ learning and I can do things that I wanna do. ~It may,~ it may not look the way I want them to look like, but that's also okay.

Andrea: And that's part of it.

Danielle: Absolutely. Yeah.

Andrea: And~ I,~ it's interesting 'cause ~I, ~the other thing that you just shared about, ~you know, um,~ you and, ~um,~ [00:59:00] Janelle meeting at Lulu and then following one another and how you, ~um, and I'm sure that's, I can't speak for her, but I would imagine that she feels similar to how you are feeling about you.~

~She, you, you ~and her want to follow one another and support one another and keep your connection live. And I feel like that's another big piece that seems to be really rising up in this time. And it's not dissimilar to Krista and I in that, in our first meeting, which was only a couple of years ago, um.

We, we knew ~like ~so quickly that we wanted to build each other up and follow one another and stay in something together. And, you know, thankfully Krista said yes to my wild idea of like, let's, can we do, can, can you join me? 'cause I don't, I really need you. And it's, it's what I'm recognizing

Krista: I'm pretty sure I inserted myself into your world, so it's

Andrea: you did.

Krista: of

Speaker: You did. But I was grateful for it. I was, I was like, I still [01:00:00] am. Every day I wake up and I'm like, thank God for Krista. Um, but I feel like ~that's what women, so many women are looking to, not looking to.~ So many women are open to that being the relationships that they have with other women in this time.

And it feels very different than in ~my,~ my twenties or thirties when my perspective around friendship or other women had a different flavor. The flavor now is, it's so authentic and it's so driven to support and advocate for, and be present for other women. Um, and ~it's a really, really powerful energy that I, that I, or, or ~it's something that I feel like very strongly kind of coursing through everything that I'm doing.

And so I love that you and Janelle. You, you found that as well. And you're doing that by coming together and then inviting people in to join ~your, join your listening, you know, join the listening, but join~ you two in your conversation. [01:01:00] Um, it just feels like we're all ~kind of~ circling around one another in this beautiful way, kind of in that community circle space.

Danielle: Yeah.

Krista: So you've got your podcast, ~but your days are, this is a fun thing that you do on the side to keep that relationship going and to talk about, you know, different~

Danielle: ~What are you talking about, Krista? We, we are highly successful. Just because he doesn't have ads doesn't mean we're not making millions off of this.~

Krista: But I ~want, I~ also wanna know what you fill your days with.~ Like, what does that, what, what do your days look like?~ Is every week a bit different? Every month a bit different? ~Um, what, uh, what, what do your days look like?~

Danielle: Well, I usually wake up at five and ~I prac,~ I have two coffees. I do my morning pages. Yeah. I cannot live without my coffee. And that's like one of my, I'm like, why, why? I love coffee so much? I'm like, I just, well,

Krista: Bougie it up, girl. It's all good. You do what you need to do, especially that early. It's fine. all the help

Danielle: And we have a puppy who I just adore and I was

Krista: Oh my gosh, I almost forgot. We need an update, uh, an updated photo.

Danielle: Oh yeah. Right, because when we spoke, yes. I think I sent you a photo of Spike, but,

Andrea: was brand new. He was tiny.

Danielle: oh, yes. And, ~um, I just,~ I just listened to one of your podcasts about, ~um, the,~ the woman [01:02:00] who was the love coach

Andrea: Oh, Franny.

Danielle: Yes. And Andrea, you said the only, like the, okay. This fantasy, unconditional love that you're describing.

I, I feel like I have that with my dog and I was like, me too. That's it. That is it. Only with my dog do I have

Andrea: Only with your

Danielle: fantasy, unconditional love. Like, let me gaze into your eyes. I mean, he is the love of my life. So anyway, I spend time with him in the morning with my morning pages.

Krista: Spike.

Danielle: and then I go to yoga.

So I do my, um,

Krista: You take a class.

Danielle: yes, I do teach once a week, sometimes two times. But you know, I don't wanna go overboard 'cause it's like effort and ease, right? Like, I'm not teaching yoga 15 times a week anymore. I did that 15 years ago, 20 years ago. So I'll do that. And then sometimes I go to my favorite coffee [01:03:00] shop Phil's, especially if it's been a challenging yoga practice.

I'm like, you know what? I need a really good coffee after this. So that's coffee number three.

Andrea: Three.

Danielle: Then I come home and I usually connect with my coaching clients, but after one o'clock, so I try not to book meetings prior to one o'clock. So I am now just really leaning into the wellness side of my coaching.

I got certified as a coach through ICF a few years ago, and that's like a holistic life coaching certification. And now that I'm incorporating the Vedic counseling into this as well too, I, I really wanna lean into what I'm most passionate about is that whole wellbeing. So I, uh, see my clients and then, you know, I was like, well consult and lead offsites and things, [01:04:00] similar things that I was doing for Lululemon.

Occasionally I'll do that and so there'll be prep for that and. Yeah, leading my retreats,

Krista: And you do your retreats twice a year, did you say?

Danielle: yes. Twice a year. One's a silent retreat in the fall, and I've been doing that now. Well, I started with the Chopra Center. We started leading those retreats about 16 years ago, and there was so much transformation that happened for people in that week of silence that when they stopped doing retreats, ~the, uh, and the silent retreat,~ I was like, I wanna keep this going.

So yeah, I've, I've been doing that and I partner with, uh, a guest teacher for that. This year is gonna be, uh, with a, a Ayurvedic physician who I had last year as well. Dr. Manas and yeah, then my, um, one that's coming up probably when this is going live, uh, we will be in Costa [01:05:00] Rica in Nosara, and that's my jungle. I always like to have like a tropical jungle one, so ~we'll be,~ we'll be there for an entire week.

Andrea: And that one is also silent or, or not a

Speaker: silent

Danielle: No, it's not silent, but we do have silent mornings, so we have quiet mornings every morning. You know, sometimes people are a little bit like, oh my gosh, silence. I can't do that. But trust me, you are gonna be with like 20 something other people for an entire week. You wanna have that quiet time, especially in the morning with your coffee or your tea, your breakfast.

And it's an opportunity for you to, I mean, we're, we spend most of our days. Distracted. Again, it's all about remembering ~right~ who you are.

Andrea: Mm-hmm.

Danielle: And so I feel like the retreat container is really like how we used to live right in community, not tied to our screens, right in [01:06:00] movement and discussion

Andrea: Hmm.

Danielle: in nature.

So immersed in nature and so when you know we create that space, especially in the morning, I like to think about that morning as like God's hour,

Krista: Hmm.

Danielle: God or universe or, or whatever spirit. It's like your time to just ~like~ be with your own thoughts and not be influenced by the media or even other people and their opinions and perspectives, but to, ~you know,~ be able to create that intention for your day.

Krista: Mm-hmm.

Danielle: day is

Krista: a beautiful way to start. Mm-hmm. Oh my gosh, yes.

Andrea: I just felt the calm in that.

Krista: Yeah. What a

Danielle: you two should come to my, you two should come to one of my retreats sometime. Um, okay. Then the other thing that I'm doing,

Speaker: down.

Krista: Yes.

Danielle: Okay. The other thing that I'm doing and~ I'm, I'm like, I'm,~ the reason why I'm sharing this is so that it holds me accountable to actually

Krista: good. Oh, I love this.

Danielle: is a goal that I've [01:07:00] had since last year.

~I started, ~I started writing my book and so since this metaphor kind of organically, Andrea, you are planting that, you planted that metaphor with me just sharing chapter.

Krista: Yes.

Danielle: was like, oh, this is another calling, this is another pull. So it's my self-help memoir where I talk about these experiences and learnings and I wanna do it in a way where it's just like, ~you know,~ really conversational, not, ~you know, ~narrative summary, but just, yeah, it feels more like me.

And maybe feels like a romance novel, page turner

Krista: Oh my gosh, yes.

Andrea: As long as I

Speaker: don't

Krista: Let us know can help

Andrea: have to wear a thong when I read it. I, I, I cannot wear a thong while I'm reading your book. I'm just gonna say,

Danielle: I think that's how I'm going to invite every reader to read this. Get your thong on, get your ass to the beach, lay on your stomach in sphynx pose.[01:08:00]

Andrea: Oh my gosh. Wow. That is a visual that I will never forget.

Krista: ~I~

Andrea: ~When will your book, yeah, when,~

Danielle: ~so my goal is to,~ so every retreat that I do is like a milestone moment for me to launch something. So at the Costa Rica retreat, they're all going to be receiving a journal that I just wrote. So it's just, ~you know, it's ~mainly blank pages, but it's like ~the,~ the first several pages is just of me sharing my experience with the process of writing and how it's been a tool for me to process through, especially difficult emotions.

So it's kind of like a combo of doing your morning pages, but also inviting in gratitude, setting intention so that you live, uh, the life that you are wanting to design, right? So often what our vision is, is disconnected from the micro choices that we make every single day. Like, does your calendar match the vision that you set for yourself?

So anyway, they're getting that. And [01:09:00] so my, my hope, and ~I know this is weak,~ I can kind of hear Andrea be like, Hey, that's not the Lululemon way of declaring your goal. I hope and pray and try that. I'm gonna have a copy for every person at my silent retreat. this September,~ end of September.~

Andrea: Heard

Krista: Wow. Okay. This is so exciting. Yes,

Danielle: You two are so sweet. Look at the, ~like,~ the breeze that you give me and the space and the ~like,~ appreciation that the two of you hold for me and all of your guests ~and, ~and everyone listening too to just for us to remember our worth. So thank you.

Andrea: Thank you.

Krista: you.

Andrea: ~Oh, the~

Krista: ~All right, well, we don't wanna go. Um, I can't believe it took us a year to get you on our podcast. This is silly.~

Danielle: ~know. I thought you guys~

Krista: ~matter you're here. It was, it was amazing. Oh my~

Danielle: ~I was like, oh, I'm not getting a second date.~

Speaker: ~No.~

Danielle: ~know, only one date.~

Speaker: ~the pause is actually, um, a sign of how much anticipation and excitement we had when we wanted to bring you back. That's what that~

Danielle: ~I am gonna take that.~

Krista: Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So listen, for people that don't know who you are, well now they do, they have so much more knowledge of who you are. If they wanna dig in a little bit deeper, if they're considering going on a retreat, where can they find all the juicy details, all [01:10:00] the information about you?~ Can they follow you?~ Do you have a website? Tell us all the things and we'll make sure that it all goes in the show notes.

Danielle: They can go to my website. It's Danielle Mika Mika's, my Japanese middle name daniellemika.com, and then I am on Instagram and LinkedIn too, and they'll just find all of that on my site.

Krista: Perfect. That's so great. You are the best. Thank you. I'm, I'm noting that you

Danielle: our podcast,

Krista: Yes. Yes. And your podcast. Okay. And, and, um, apple, Spotify.

Danielle: yes, all the places that you can listen to podcast. And we're on YouTube as well, so yeah, if people wanna see us in Action Coffee Unlimited with j and d.

Krista: Coffee and

Andrea: we can find you at Phil's in San Diego

Danielle: can find

Andrea: on any given morning.

Danielle: Yes,

Andrea: Phils is gonna blow up, like,

Danielle: in [01:11:00] Encinitas. That's where I will be. Phil's in Encinitas. Pour over coffee. And there's a guy named Phil ~there~ who works there and sometimes he comes to my yoga class to fill,

Andrea: out

Krista: oh, Phil.

Danielle: fill up fills exactly.

Krista: I love this. It's so beautiful. Okay, uh, well for you listening wherever you are, whether you're on a run or in your car, make sure that you're following us on, uh, on Instagram at Half Betty. And for Andrea and myself, we're on LinkedIn as well. So please hop over to LinkedIn and see what we've got going on there.

~Andrea is much more active on LinkedIn than I am. She's so good. She goes so good with words and all the things.~ And thank you for joining us today. ~Hope you learned something.~ If this episode resonated with you in a way where ~you're like, oh,~ it made you think of somebody, why don't you send them~ the podcast, send them ~the episode, and then use that to start a conversation.

That's what we would love for you today. So thank you for joining us. Danielle, thank you so, so much for spending your morning with us, even though ~you know, usually~ now we know that you usually have these mornings to yourself, so I really [01:12:00] appreciate you taking the time.

Danielle: Thank you both so much.

Speaker 2: ~Thank you,~

Krista: ~everyone.~